Showface
by xoxoSILxoxo
Summary: What the crowd didn't know was that this was something Jesse had taught her. A fake showface. A smile so bright it was literally killing her. Rachel centered-multi. Eventual PuckelBerry.
1. The Seed of Doubt

**This is set after Regionals. Though technically, I wrote this part before the Finale and I thought they would win, but, they didn't, so a few minor adjustments were made. This is set while Rachel is still at Regionals after losing, but the rest will be at the start of the next school year.**

**I should be updating this every two days, just FYI, because I didn't get quite as far as I planned, but as of now, I have 1/3 of this completed.**

**Okay, I'm done talking now.**

**Disclaimer: [Insert pointless and somewhat witty disclaimer here]**

* * *

Prologue: The Seed of Doubt

_"Vocal Adrenaline!" Rachel's heart stopped. The two words she did not want to hear. Blood pounded in her ears and she could feel tears rolling softly down her cheeks. She turned her head slightly and saw Jesse, taking the trophy, and she doubted anyone missed the smug look her sent her way._

_ She let out a deep breath as Rod Remington handed them the considerably smaller third place trophy, and let Artie squeeze her hand even tighter as he said quietly "We didn't even place."_

_ She swallowed again as the mother that didn't want her gazed her way. She shook her hair back and stood a little straighter, trying to ignore the cheers coming from the other side of the stage. Then she let out her most professional, "Congratulations" complete with her own megawatt smile. What the crowd didn't know was that this was something Jesse had taught her. A fake showface. _

_ A smile so bright it was literally killing her._

* * *

A tall man walked up to the young brunette who was currently shaking hands with countless amounts of adoring fans, each giving their praise. He watched as they exited one by one, leaving the girl to finally sit, with a smile as bright as the stars. Surprisingly cheerful for one who's dreams had just been crushed.

He walked up slowly and sat down in front of her.

"You're very good you know." She opened her mouth to thank him but he merely cut her off. "I'm almost positive they've been over hyping you though. You're good, special, but not _great_." Her jaw went slack in surprise. "You have potential, it's such a shame you lost."

"T-thank you?" She answered timidly, as if it was a question.

"What's your name?"

"Rachel Berry." She answered automatically.

"Well Rachel Berry, my name is Mr. Mann." He said, twiddling his thumbs. "I'm from the Illinois show choir department." He paused, scratching the back of his neck before continuing. "We could use your talent on our team."

Rachel's look turned icy. "I'm sorry, I'm with New Directions." She replied tartly, gathering her things.

Mr. Mann put a steady hand on her shoulder. "Rachel, _you _do have potential. But be honest, do you really think the rest of them are going to make it out of Lima?"

"She jerked out of his grip. "That's none of your concern." She turned on her heel and began to walk away.

"Rachel!" He called after her. "You don't need them!"

She slowed down her pace just enough to say, "But they need me," over her shoulder. But then Mr. Mann said something that made her stop.

"But they don't want you. And they don't _deserve_ you." She blinked several times, unsure how to respond, but the man only tipped his hat and walked away as if nothing had changed.

But the seed of doubt had already been planted.

* * *

**A/N:** **Okay, I'm putting another little note here because there is something I need to explain.**

** This IS as I said before a PuckelBerry piece, but it's not gonna be one of the those unrealistic **_**'Finn never even existed, I always loved you'**_** ones that I hate to death though sometimes tolerate. Finn existed and Rachel wasted a good portion of her time chasing after him. So that means you're going to have to put up with some Finchel (dramafied) closure before we get to the good stuff.**

** But yes, still PuckelBerry.**

* * *

Chapter One: Foreshadowing

_Three months later…_

"Are you ready?" Rachel stopped staring out the window for a moment and turned to her boyfriend as Finn gave her a goofy grin. She laughed silently and answered, "Right now I'm just praying for a slushie cease-fire, I didn't bring any extra clothes today."

"No I mean about Glee! I think we have a real shot this year!" He said excitedly. He saw the lack of emotion on her face and his smile dropped slightly. "Don't you think? I mean, Jesse isn't on Vocal Adrenaline anymore…"

She had to physically stop herself from wincing. She may be _completely_ over the boy who had broken her heart just months ago, but it been a long time since she had heard his name thrown around so causally.

That and the fact you don't usually talk about your ex's with your boyfriend.

She plastered a large grin on her face as they turned into the school's parking lot. "Well, as long as everyone doesn't slack off, I do think we have a chance of winning. After all, we hit quite a few roadblocks last year, so who knows? If things go smoothly we might finally be able to take Nationals."

Finn looked somewhere between satisfied with her answer and confused by it, a face she saw a lot. She smiled anyway and gave him a kiss on the cheek as she got out of the car. He followed her like a lost puppy all the way to her locker, saying hi to friends along the way. He silently took her books as she emptied them out of her book bag.

Finn glanced around the hall quickly. "Wow." He breathed. "It looks exactly the same as last year." She let out a little laugh as she starting pinning up her mirror.

"Except we're older now." She pointed out. "I'm not a sophomore anymore." He nodded, watching as she adjusted the mirror one last time before heading down the hall to her first class.

"Umm, Rach? Aren't we a little early?" He glanced at the nearby clock. "Class doesn't start for like five minutes." She quickly grabbed the books out of his hand.

"Timeliness is very important Finn." She gave his hand one last squeeze before turning to face the near empty class room. "See you in second period."

She was really not looking forward to going back to school. In fact, if it wasn't for Glee she wasn't sure she would have dragged herself here at all.

But then again, she gets that feeling every summer. Every time she goes to various camps and makes friends, and is properly free of corn syrup for more than two days in a row. And of course, without school, Finn and she could just _exist_. They didn't have to worry about people watching, or trying to get in the way. There was no stress. It was like they were lost in time. Things were perfect.

Boyfriend. She loved saying that word. Being able to use it in a sentence, or even just say that she had one. It was a rare coincidence for her. She loved just being able to throw it out there, and she noticed that sometimes when she did, people looked at her a little different. Like they had just realized that she obviously had _some_ redeeming qualities if she had a boyfriend.

But she was worried. Because they last of her in school boyfriends didn't go so well. Finn included. In fact, it pretty much ended in her singing All American Rejects quite loudly, (she tended to do that when she was angry).

Plus, she just had this feeling. A sixth sense, if you will. That this year was not a good one. That something bad was just destined to happen. That things were not going to end well.

She just hasn't figured out if that means Finn or the apocalypse yet.

"Oh, hi Rachel." Mr. Schuster's voice snapped her out of her daydreams.

"Hi Mr. Schuster. Did you have a good summer?" He stapled a packet together and nodded.

"I got a lot of things done actually. I sold my apartment and moved into a somewhat smaller one, and I have a lot of plans for Glee this year, of course I'm sure you do too." He said, smirking knowingly at the end.

She returned the gesture. "As always. I think it might be key to focus on the emotion in the songs this year, we don't want to end up like Vocal Adrenaline."

"That sounds good," He agreed, gathering up the papers. "I'll be right back; I just need to make a few copies." She nodded, as he collected all of his things before exiting, leaving Rachel completely alone.

* * *

Rachel came home to the sound of yelling.

"You spend every waking minute at the damn firm! You've gone away for cases before, but this is the week of our eighteen year anniversary! Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"Leroy, calm down, Rachel's home." There was silence in the kitchen as Rachel drew a breath and walked into the room quietly. Her dad gave her an apologetic look as Daddy nodded and walked out of the room.

Dad turned back to the stove as is nothing had happened. "So how was school?"

* * *

Rachel let the hot water of the shower wash away her pain and memories of the long day. She scrubbed until her skin peeled, and until she couldn't waste any more time in the shower. So she drew the curtain back and pulled on her pajamas, getting ready for the long night ahead.

After setting her clock she turned to her computer, the screen playing the same slideshow of pictures over and over again. She gave a sigh and took a seat on the spindly chair.

She wasn't sure why she was on her laptop, just to waste time, she supposes. So she checked her mail. Nothing. She checked her MySpace. Nothing. She checked her Facebook. Nothing.

She was just about to click out of the internet when something caught her eye. Her lonely little friend box, that read twenty-four, and was filled with family and glee club members. She might see it about every day but for some reason that little box put a tiny sinking feeling in the middle of her stomach that she didn't quite know how to place.

In fact, it wasn't until she was lying in bed did she figure it out. It was the type of feeling you get when you read a sob story too many times. It's sad at first, but then it happens again and again, and you get bored. You don't want to feel sad for the same reason anymore.

Rachel was tired of being lonely, and upset, and friendless, and crazy, and _slushied_.

Screw psychic ability, this year was going to be _great_.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, it's short and not that good. But it WILL get better, and it WILL be long. So give it a chance! Also, does anybody know how old Finn is? Sophomore or Junior? Or senior? I really don't know. But if I don't get an answer I'm just going to assume he's a sophomore like Rachel. But wouldn't that make them all sophomore's? A glee club of just sophomores'? Is that weird? **

**Also! It would tickle me pink if you guys would try your hand and predictions! This goes for all chapters! I wanna see if what I'm planning is completely obvious of not. Thanks again, R&R!**

**Oh yeah, Puck's grand entrance next chapter. (REMINDER: THIS IS A PUCKELBERRY)**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	2. Inside Out

**PLEASE READ!**

**Okay, here is my second chapter, all planed out.**

**DA DA DA DA! The Grand entrance of Puck! YAY!**

**Also, about the whole Finn/Rachel closure, Yeah, it's moving kind of fast, but keep in mind, this is **_**not**_** a Finchel piece, so excuse me if I'm shoving that option out the door a little too quickly. Also note that this whole debacle? Not. Over. Yet.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Glee or Avril Lavigne just borrowing. **

* * *

Chapter Two: Inside Out

_The Next Day…_

Rachel ripped through her closet for what must have been the thousandth time. She had to have the most perfect outfit for the most perfect day of the most perfect school year. However her clothes were definitely not cooperating, and she couldn't find the one blouse that would have been just right for this special occasion.

She let out an exasperated sigh as she collapsed on her bed, right on top of a pile of newly ironed clothes. She groaned again, and pulled herself up before she could ruin them further.

Giving up, she grabbed the nearest sweater and skirt combination she could find, and searched for her favorite pair of flats, which she had kicked under the bed at some point. Bending over, she found one next to her night stand, and the other next to another pair of familiar shoes under her bed.

She slowly pulled out her flats, and also the gorgeous shoes Kurt had convinced her to buy for her 'Makeover'. She hadn't worn them since.

But, she thought as she pulled them on anyway, there's a second time for everything.

Just as she walked out the door, her phone vibrated with a new text. She pulled it out and saw a message from Finn.

**Cant drive 2day, Im workin on sumting skool. **

She grimaced. She didn't mind that Finn couldn't drive her, but her Prius was in the shop, and she could hardly walk in these heels.

Turning back around to the house, she remembered how her fathers had left for work early today, so their cars were gone as well. She gritted her teeth together in frustration, then prepared for what was sure to be a long walk to school.

She made it about four blocks until she was ready to swear off heels forever. She made it five more steps until finally removing the god-forsaken shoes off her feet, and walking barefoot down the street, an extremely irritated expression on her face.

That might have been why Puck was laughing so hard when he pulled up beside her.

"Need a ride Berry?" She shot him one hard look and continued walking. He smirked evilly and continued his car at exactly her pace, speeding up every time she did.

She stopped for a moment, looking at the heels in her hand, than at the grinning boy in the truck. She wasn't exactly sure what to do in this type of situation. Sure Finn and Puck had been friendly toward each other lately, surely on the road to forgiveness, but would it seem suspicious if she arrived at school with him? Would it upset Finn?

She looked at her heels again and decided she was past caring. If she had to walk the next mile and a half to school she'd disable herself permanently, and she _must_ live to be a triple threat.

So she hopped into Noah Puckerman's truck for the first time since they had dated, and hastily put on her shoes.

Puck snickered as he watched her. "Nice 'Fuck me' heels Berry." She shot him a death glare.  
"Probably not good for walking though." He added as an afterthought, starting the car.

They sat in silence for another few minutes before Puck finally asked, "Where's Finn?"

She spared one glance in his direction. "He's working on something at school." Puck's eyebrows rose.

"It's only the second day." She merely shrugged, then changed the subject.

"Our first Glee practice is today, are you excited?" Somehow her conversations with him always revolved around those two things. Finn and Glee. But what else was there really to talk about? After all, they didn't have much in common.

He shrugged. "I guess it would be cool if we actually won this year." She nodded in agreement. She was all up for the journey, and 'winning's not important,' but still, there are only so many times you can lose and still keep going.

Puck chuckled beside her. She turned to face him again. "What's so funny?" He merely chuckled again.

"Remember last Regionals? The guys who won second? Aural Intensity?" She nodded, but then noticed his eyes were on the road, as they should be.

"Yeah, so?" There was a beat.

"Think about Berry, Aural Intensity!" Her face froze for a moment. And then she got it.

"Noah!" She gasped then hit him lightly on the shoulder as he laughed harder.

"For someone smart that sure took you a while." He pointed out, still laughing as he stared ahead.

"Well my minds not always in the most perverted place possible!" She said definitely, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Ha, I bet you didn't figure out New Directions then either." She didn't answer. He cast a side-long glance at her. "Sound it out." He said in a mocking tone.

"N-e-w D-i-r-e-c-t-i-o-n-s." She said cluelessly.

"Slur it a bit." He said, smiling in anticipation.

"N-u-d-e E-r-, Noah! That's awful! Only you would figure that out!" He laughed again as she sat beside him fuming with disapproval. "You're so immature." She muttered angrily as he continued to laugh at the shock on her face.

"Whatever Berry." He said, recovering. "We're here." He reached across and popped open her door. She smiled at the gentlemanly gesture, and decided to forgive him for the time being.

"Thank you for the ride Noah. I'll see you in Glee." He gave her a little half wave as she got out. She tugged her bag further over her shoulder, and then sent Noah one last look before heading into the school building.

She was later to school than she normally was and running down the hall in a rush to get to her locker when she nearly passed Finn. But then again, he was just standing there with a rather confused expression on his face. She skidded to a halt.

"Finn?" His head snapped toward hers. "Are you okay?" He blinked several times.

"Umm…" The poor looked hopelessly lost, and very scared. Her eyebrows raised in confusion as she waited for an explanation.

"I was just…" He gestured toward the door then back. Her eyebrows rose higher. "I mean I…" Higher. "I-I'm fine." He finished lamely.

Rachel nodded her head slowly. "Okay." She put her hands up in a shrug, then lowered them again.

"You're here early." He commented hurriedly, as he took her arm and started walking down the hall.

She glanced at the clock then looked at him incredulously. "Actually I'm late, are you sure you're okay Finn? You're acting strange."

His face froze in frustration, like he was arguing with himself. When his expressions settled, he sighed and pulled her over to the side of the suddenly crowded hallway.

It all seemed so familiar.

_" I don't think I wanna be your boyfriend."_

"I think we should… take a break."

She froze. She waited for the heartbreak, the tears. But she didn't feel anything, and it was scaring her. She was just plainly and overwhelmingly shocked.

_"…What?"_

"…What?" She said quietly. "…W-why?"

He had the decency to look ashamed. Even hurt, a bit regretful, not sympathetic like last time. "I-I… I'm sorry." He finally said, looking truly upset. "I just…. sorry." She watched as he turned his back and walked down the hall.

So much for perfection.

* * *

She was getting weird looks to say the least. It was the first day of Glee, she was expected to be chipper and happy, singing something painfully optimistic. Maybe something involving rainbows. Or sunshiny days, true love, and happiness. Not Avril Lavigne.

She opened her eyes on her musical cue to face her audience for the first time in three months.

_Let's talk this over,_

_It's not like we're dead,_

_Was it something I did?_

_Was it something you said?_

The music didn't even exaggerate what she was feeling. She just didn't understand. They had a chance, what had she done? Just, why?

_Don't leave me hanging,_

_In a city do dead,_

_Held up so high_

_On such a breakable thread,_

She took a deep breath and continued, finally opening her eyes.

_You were all the things I thought I knew,_

_And I thought we could be…_

Various expressions rose from all around the room. Kurt looked smug, Quinn pitying, Puck confused (and somewhat angry), Finn ashamed.

_You were everything, everything_

_That I wanted_

How many times had she been up here singing just to him? How many rivers had she cried? She didn't get it. She wanted it to work, he hurt her, and she just _kept coming back_, and getting hurt all over again because she had a firm belief that this would just work someday.

_We were meant to be, supposed to be,_

_But we lost it,_

_How do the memory's so close to me_

_Just fade away,_

_All this time you were pretending,_

This wasn't supposed to happen just like it had before. It was like some badly written drama. She chased after him, he chased after her, one heartbreak after another.

He was her dream come true. He was exactly what she needed. He was the key to making everything better, to making this year absolutely special. Together they could be perfect. But like every other time, _something_ got in the way.

_So much for my happy ending._

* * *

**A/N: Ha, I actually laughed out loud at the 'badly written drama' line, because just by the way, this totally is a drama. I'm just hoping you don't think it's badly written! Sorry I took longer getting this out than I originally planned, but I've been super busy. Sorry. Anyway, review! **

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	3. Insult to Injury

**And here is me, shoving Finchel out the shipper door. For **_**this**_** story anyway.**

**Disclaimer: Blah blah blah, don't own.**

* * *

Chapter Three: Insult to Injury 

_One Week Later…_

If she hadn't wanted to go to school before, she definitely didn't now. Now that there wasn't even a small glimmer of hope that this year would be good. She sighed to herself, it was only her second day and she was already doomed.

She heard a loud honk from outside. Frowning, she got up from where she was sitting and moved over to her window. Puck's truck was waiting outside.

Confused, she ran downstairs and grabbed her back pack, closing the door after her as she ran outside. She jogged through her yard and over to his window as he rolled it down. "Umm, hi?"

"S'up Berry? You getting in?" He asked without any further explanation. Her eyebrows rose, but she walked around his car and slid quietly into the passenger seat.

"I wasn't aware we'd be carpooling today." He shrugged from next to her, driving off her street.

"I figured you might want someone to talk to."

Warmth flooded through her, a little smile on her face. Somebody cared other than her parents. But then she remembered that person was Noah Puckerman, and she became confused again. "But, you _hate_ talking about feelings."

He growled. "Look Berry, you're making this harder than it needs to be. I'm trying to be friendly here." She rolled her eyes.

"Maybe you could start be calling me by my first name. That's pretty friendly."

"Don't wanna talk about it, gotcha." He interrupted, completely ignoring her last statement. She didn't say anything, because honestly, she didn't. At all.

She turned the conversation on him instead. "What about Quinn?" He was silent for a moment.

"What _about_ Quinn?" He finally said. She didn't know how to answer, because she wasn't entirely sure. They had had a child together, surely that meant they were in some type of relationship. Did they break up? She didn't understand the situation anymore, and she hadn't talked to them in who knows how long.

"Well, I mean," She sputtered. "Are you… together?" He thought about this for a moment.

"I love her."

_Oh._ Was all she thought at first. She hadn't been expecting that. Not that it bothered her, she harbored no romantic feelings for Noah, but that doesn't mean she could sit through and entire car ride listening to him rant about the perfect Quinn Fabray. She was still too far in her post-breakup haze to be okay with that.

"But I don't think I'm _in love_ with her. And she certainly isn't with me. Maybe once, but…" He was opening up to her. Slowly, he was letting her in. She almost forgot to look serious.

"No. Were not together." And just like that he was shut up again. Hidden away from view, protected from the world. She noticed the speedometer rise as he pressed down harder on the gas pedal than necessary.

"But you're friends I hope." She added hastily, trying to calm him down.

"Sure." He deadpanned. "After all we had a baby together. I'd like to think we're friends."

She zoned for a minute. Lost in thoughts of Beth Puckerman, and she wasn't even really paying attention when she respond somewhat dreamily. "My mother adopted her."

The car lurched forward, literally screeching against the pavement, and Rachel had to clutch onto the sides for support. "What?" Puck shouted angrily, facing her.

"I-I," She hadn't thought about his reaction. She wasn't even sure if he knew or not. "I mean, I was talking to her at Regionals, and I mention why you all had left, to deliver the baby, and she-I guess," She was rambling and she knew it. Puck stared at her lividly waiting for her to finish. "I mean, she can't have children, but she wanted a baby, so she adopted her!" She finished quickly. Puck turned away from her for a second, his head hitting the back of the seat. After a minute he leaned forward and started the car again, heading towards to school parking lot.

"She named her Beth." Rachel added hesitantly. He nodded at this.

The rest of the car ride was silent as he pulled into the loop, dropping her off in the front this time. He popped open her door without looking into her eyes, and she got out without saying a word. No goodbyes, nothing.

She felt pretty bad when he drove away again. But she was pulled out of her guilt by to voice of none other than Jacob Ben Israel.

"Hi Rachel, I was wondering if I could just get a quick interview from you. My blogs have been slow lately, not a lot of gossip on the first days of school." She didn't even glance at him as she began to walk away.

He followed her into the building. "I would have posted your juicy new break-up, but I didn't, I thought you might be upset." She didn't respond as she opened her locker. He ran to catch up with her and stood at her locker for a few moments, panting. "I didn't even post the videos." He said sincerely.

She stopped for a moment. "What videos?" His eyes gleamed at her response and she immediately regretted talking to him. He was like a hungry animal, and words were his food. And if you feed him once, it would take days to get him to go away again.

She grimaced at that particular metaphor as soon as she thought it. Because it sounded _way_ too different than what she was actually thinking about.

"Oh, just the usual, break up videos, reaction videos," Rachel was staring at him as he talked; trying to decide what was horrifying enough to compare him to. "You can watch them in you want."

She rolled her eyes when he got back her attention. "Why would I want to watch them? I was _there_." She scoffed, grabbing the last of her books and slamming her locker shut just in time to see Jacob's eyebrows rise.

"You were there when Finn Hudson kissed Quinn Fabray? I thought _he_ broke up with _you_."

Every muscle in her body turned to ice, while blood rushed to her head, drowning it completely. Her ears started to ring and her heart beat wildly, she was suddenly very aware of all the people around her.

"What?" Was all she managed to choke out. His eyes widened.

"You mean you didn't know?" He practically squealed with girlish delight. "This makes an even better story! Sorry Rachel I've got to go!" He cried, dashing off down the hall. Rachel was usually a nonviolent person, but she was getting the overwhelming urge to ram Finn's head into a locker, or break his heart somehow, anything to make him feel even a fraction of what she was feeling now.

But it all made since. That's where he was that morning. That's why he broke up with her, why he was standing there with a look of complete shock on his face. And all the sympathetic and slightly guilty looks from Quinn?

She gritted her teeth together. Quinn Fabray. She would _always_ play second fiddle to that girl. Every time. Even if it was just a high school fling like with Puck. Even her own mother wanted a little piece of Quinn Fabray more than her.

Hurt, angry tears flew down Rachel's face as she squinted, trying to see through her tears and will her mascara not to run. She was going to find Finn and give him a piece of her mind. She was going to find him and-

The next thing she knew she was covered in cherry slushy, with Karofksy laughing as he turned the corner.

"Oh you have got to be kidding me."

* * *

She found him in the library, sitting there, struggling through a Shakespearian book. At any other time than this she would have laughed at the silly expression on his face. He glanced up at the sound of her approach, then down, then up again.

"Rachel?" He asked worriedly.

This was it. Her big speech. The time to make him feel completely awful and get the revenge that she wanted and deserved. But somehow all she could say was "You cheated on me."

His face fell and his eyes glossed over. "I-" He stammered.

She cut him off. "You cheated on me. Then you broke up with me and didn't even tell me that you did." She sobbed. "I had _no idea_. I thought that _I _had done something wrong. I thought it was all _my_ fault. And you didn't even bother to correct me. I thought that there was something wrong with _me_,"

His face scrunched in guilt. "I-it wasn't supposed to happen. She just wanted to talk to me. I-I was afraid to tell you because, well I don't know, but then she just… kissed me, and then she ran… and I-"

"Well it least you know how it feels." She muttered through clenched teeth. "To have someone run." His face burned bright red.

"That was different." Rachel didn't see how. "Anyway," He continued. "You came up like, seconds after she ran, I was just so confused…" He closed his eyes and shook his head at himself. He reached out for her hands. She pulled them away and crossed her arms over her chest, taking a step back.

He sighed. "The only reason I broke up with was because I didn't want to hurt you." She scoffed. "No, I mean," He said hopelessly, trying to correct his mistake. "I didn't want to be in a relationship with you if I had feelings for Quinn, I didn't want to do that for you." Rachel nodded slowly and uncrossed her arms.

Finn took the opportunity to grab her hands again, grasping them tightly so she couldn't pull away. "But I figured it out. I don't have feelings for her. I don't like _her_. I like, what we were. Or what I was…" He struggled to make his point, before failing and starting over again. "I liked who I was when I was with her. I mean, not exactly, not the whole, awful jock part but, things were simple, and easy. Now everything's all complicated."

You're telling her.

He turned his head back and looked right into her eyes. "But it didn't mean anything Rachel. She kissed me. I don't have feelings for her, I figured it out." He straightened himself up. "And if you can ever forgive me…" He trailed off, and looked at her hopelessly. She carefully unfolded her hands from his as she gazed at him, contemplated all he had said.

He was going to kill her one day. With all his charm and his naivety and the way he could just make his things better because he was so damn honest. And so sincere. The way he made it so she would fall for it every single time.

But he was right. Everything was complicated. But it didn't have to be. All she wanted at that moment was to be in a musical, where everything was planned and laid out, just to have a happy ending. Where couples loved each other and that's all that mattered. A place where true love prevailed and you could do wrong. She wanted the guy Mr. Schuester had been talking about, one who loved every single part of her, even the parts she didn't like.

And a small hopeful part of her thought Finn could be that guy.

She had made up her mind.

"Finn. I believed in you. I gave you every chance I could possibly offer, and forgave you for every fault. But that, that was you, blowing the last chance I was willing to give." He lowered his eyes in shame. A single tear fell down her cheek as she took another step back. "I'm sorry."

They could have been great, amazing, show stopping, and they were. On the outside. They had chemistry that could light up a stage; he was the perfect Tony to her Maria.

But this wasn't a musical. And as upsetting as it may be, there was more to love than sounding good singing, or looking good together. And even though he was the one who ruined it, she felt like it was partially her fault. Her fault for not realizing that, and dragging them both into this mess. And she was sorry.

She really was.

* * *

**A/N: I didn't notice how **_**sad**_** this story was turning out be until I was contemplating the irony of the "This is not a musical" line at the end. Then again, I have a lot of drama planned out for this story, so I might as well get used to it. Hmm… maybe I'll write a funny one-shot to lighten my spirits!**

**NEW CHARACTER APPERANCE NEXT CHAPTER!**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	4. Moving On

**Alright, I'm giving you a warning, MAJOR FLUFF CHAPTER! I'm kind of just adding this in there to backbone some things that are gonna happen later on, and give time for Rachel to have closure and blah blah blah. So don't expect much drama for **_**this**_** chapter.**

** Also, I kind of hate it when writers just throw in crappy makeshift characters for fun, so I'm aware that I'm being extremely hypocritical, but the character I'm adding in is in some ways necessary for certain things that aren't entirely necessary for the purpose of the story, but I promised myself I would do. If that makes sense AT ALL.**

**Disclaimer: I own Glee! Oh wait… no I don't. I'm just some crazy person with laptop and brain full of ideas.**

* * *

Chapter Four: Moving On

_Two Days Later…_

Rachel stood awkwardly in the doorway as her dad packed his suitcase for his trip to New York.

"So, you're both leaving?" Daddy sighed and turned around to face Rachel.

"Well, honey, your dad has a case out in New Jersey, and I'm going to your Aunt Barbara's to help her plan her wedding." Rachel's eyes rose.

"The Barbara I got my middle name after?" Her Aunt Barbara was closing in on fifty years old, which is a strange time for a rather short, plump woman to be getting married. Then again, it might have something to do with the thousands of dollars she had in the bank.

Her daddy chuckled. "Sweetie, we named you after Barbara Streisand, but it she ever asks you, make sure to deny it." He said, winking at her.

Rachel smiled, but also shifted uncomfortably, something bothering her. "Isn't your anniversary this weekend?" Her daddy froze.

"Rachel, it's our eighteenth anniversary, we don't need to do anything special." He stopped, sensing her discomfort. "We'll celebrate later as a family." She accepted this hesitantly, pushing the unpleasant thought away.

"Am I going to be here all alone?" Daddy shook his head as he tried to shove his socks into his overflowing suitcase.

"No, your cousin Connor is coming by to watch you." Rachel grinned. Her cousin Connor was about twenty years old and still in college, but he dropped out multiple times a year to come by and watch her, thanks to her ever moving fathers.

She loved Connor more than the rest of her cousins, he was fun and easy to talk to, but also a bit reckless and a bit more like Puck than she was happy with. She had never really noticed because they were family, but she supposes now that he was quite handsome. He had ruffled brown hair and shimmering green eyes, and he was very well built and muscular. He was also quite the ladies man, which was more than a little awkward.

Especially when he brought his girlfriends home. Or worse, when she woke up to find him in the bedroom with them. Sometimes her bedroom. Connor was the whole reason she ever had the birds and the bees talk with her parents.

But he bought her ice cream. And he listened when he talked, and he even pretended to be her boyfriend one time to get a guy jealous. So she put up with it.

"Oh yeah? And when's he coming down?" She asked excitedly.

"Oh, any time I'd imagine. You know Connor."

Rachel gave her daddy as kiss on the cheek as she ran into her room.

The rest of the day was spent flitting around the house, helping her dads pack and waiting for any sound of approaching motorcycles.

Three thirty came, and she showed her dads out to door, hugging them goodbye, and promising to text them telling them she was alright.

It was about ten minutes later when he showed up. She heard the sound of the engine revving as she ran out the door, locking the house behind her.

"S'up coz?" He asked, stepping off the bike and taking his helmet off. She grinned brightly and gave him a hug. He smiled as she pulled away, shaking his hair slightly. He gave her a good one over and scrutinized her face before asking, "Are you okay? You look beat." His eyes squinted concernedly.

She grimaced. "Just a bad start to the year. It's kind of a long story." He flashed her a grin.

"Well why don't I take you out for ice cream and you can tell me all about it." She scoffed.

"I'm not five, Connor." He laughed.

"I guess you don't want this then," He said, bending over and picking up a bike helmet. It was pink and covered in glitter and gold star, bearing the name Rachel Berry.

She squealed. "You actually got it! You told me you'd die before carrying around a bedazzled bike helmet!" She attempted to grab it from his hands, but he pulled it back, and put it on her head himself.

"Hell, I don't know anybody here, it doesn't really matter. Come on," He said, jumping back onto his bike.

* * *

They arrived at the ice cream shop in record time, and they sat down at her favorite booth. Being here with him reminded her of the old times when he took her here when she was little, and all the things she told him about.

He scooted into the booth. And waited patiently for Rachel to begin to tell her tale.

She honestly didn't know where to begin. She told him about the most recent part of her and Finn's relationship, how he had cheated on her, and how she told him he'd blown all his chances.

She had only just finished when her milkshake arrived.

"So what was the deal with Quinn and Finn before?" he paused for a moment. "Wow, no wonder they didn't work, their names rhyme." She giggled.

"Well, Finn was dated her at the beginning of the year when she got pregnant." His eyebrows rose. "But then Finn found out, well, I told him, but, he found out that he wasn't actually the father."

Connor nearly choked on his milkshake. "Sense when did your high school turn into 90210?"She shook her head and continued, feeling more like Kurt with each passing second.

"Get this, he wasn't the father, his best friend Noah Puckerman was" Connor gave short laugh of appreciation at the drama.

"And was this Noah Puckerman in glee club?" He questioned. Rachel just nodded. "Did you know him? Were you friends?" Rachel took a sip as she contemplated how to answer.

"Well, we dated once, but I was very brief, we both liked other people." Connor nodded and made a move toward the napkins before freezing, something catching his eye. "What?" She asked.

He moved again. Once he had grabbed the napkins he snuck another glance somewhere across the room and asked, "What does he look like?"

She was surprised at the question. "Oh, well, I mean, he used to have a mohawk, but then he shaved it off… why do you ask?" Connor gave another laugh and pointed across the room with his straw.

"Because he's sitting over there giving me the stink eye." Rachel spun around fast enough to give herself head damage. Sure enough, there he was, sitting right next to his little sister, staring angrily in their direction.

She nearly laughed out loud. She faced Connor for a second. "Yep, that's him. I'm gonna go over and say hi!" She scooted back her chair and rushed over to his table as Connor watched in amusement.

He greeted her with a hearty, "Another one already? Pretty slutty Berry." She scoffed and put her hands on her hips.

"First of all, I'm horrified that you would talk like that in front of your little sister, and second, Connor is my _cousin_." She stated haughtily.

Puck's face lightened at the word cousin, and he opened his mouth to say something before his sister cut him off. "Hi Rachel!"

Rachel smiled at the little girl. "Hi Anna, how are you? It's good to see you again."

The seven year old beamed up at her. "Can we go sit with you Rachel? Noah's really boring. He just sits here and stares at people and whenever I try to talk to him he just tells me to shut up and eat my ice cream!" She whined and Puck rolled his eyes.

Rachel shot him a hard look. "Of course you can sit with me Anna." She glanced at Puck again. "Would you like to join us Noah? I'd feel bad stealing your little sister."

"Sure, I'd love to have ice cream with you and your arm candy." It was Rachel's turn to roll her eyes as she grabbed Anna's hand and lead her over to where Connor was smirking knowingly.

"Connor," Rachel said as she sat down. "This is Noah Puckerman and his little sister Anna, they're going to join us for ice cream." Connor turned to Puck and gave him an appraising look before nodding, sticking his hand out and saying, "Nice to meet you."

Puck grunted in response, then slid over on the other side of the booth.

"So Anna, how's your new year at school? Do you like it so far?" Rachel asked as she took a large sip of her strawberry milkshake. Anna shook her head wildly.

"First grades awesome, but my teachers really scary." She proclaimed, then filled her mouth with milkshake. She swallowed thickly then continued, "Her names Ms. Cannons."

"Ms. Cannons?" Rachel repeated. "I had her in third grade but she was really nice!"

Anna nodded. "She's our music teacher. She is nice but she made me get up and sing in front of the whole class."

Connor laughed at the scandalized look on Rachel's face. "What's so wrong with that?"

"I _hate_ singing." She explained. "I'm really bad at it too." Puck scoffed.

"Your fine twerp, you just psyche yourself out before you even start singing." He said, nudging her in the shoulder. Anna looked down dejectedly.

Rachel reached over the table and patted her shoulder. "All singers need practice, and lessons. I could teach you if you want."

"Really?" Anna's face broke into a wide grin. "Noah says you're a really good singer." Noah shifted uncomfortably as Rachel shot him a smug look. "That would be awesome! I asked Noah to give me lessons but he said no way. He doesn't like helping me with things. He taught me how to play football though, but that games boring and you smell all gross afterward." She rambled, her nose wrinkling in disgust.

Connor turned to Puck. "You play football?" He nodded. "So did I. I was quarterback of my High school team."

Puck's eyebrows rose. "High school? So what, are you in college?"

Connor laughed. "Yeah, I get that a lot. I go to UCLA." He was interrupted by a loud slurping sound from Anna.

"Noah, I'm all done. Can we go home now?" She gazed up at him with wide eyes.

"Yeah sure, see you around Rachel." Rachel blinked several times, as she processed the past few seconds. He had actually called her by her first name!

She didn't even notice she was smiling like an idiot until Connor burst into laughter.

"What?"

"Ha, you should see to look on your face. And on his! Ha!" He bending over, nearly choking on his drink.

Rachel crossed her arms over her chest in frustration. "I refuse to see what's so hilarious."

"What's hilarious is you're in denial! The way he was staring at you the whole time, I could have cut the sexual tension with a knife!" Rachel's mouth hung open for a few good seconds.

"That's ridiculous. And even if it was true, it would be inappropriate. I need time to mourn my relationship." She said, sounding more like she was convincing herself than anyone else.

He threw his hands up in defeat. "If you say so." He stood up and held out his hand for her. "Come on Rach, time to be heading home." She nodded and yawned noticeably before taking his arm and following him out the door.

* * *

**A/N: Alright, the Connor character might seem a little pointless right now, but trust me he is a part of a bigger story line that will rear its ugly head next chapter. **** Also, I have no idea what Puck's little sister's real name is, or even anything about her, ditto with the Fathers Berry, so forgive me for any lack of information.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	5. Friendly Acquaintances

** Okay, Connor's true purpose is revealed. Sorry for the lack of Puck and other Glee interaction in this chapter but I promised myself I would give Rachel at least **_**one **_**girl friend (as in a friend that's not a guy) before… well you'll see. **

** So yeah, if you haven't figure it out be now, this multi is kind of soapy, so it varies ranges from particularly angsty to bubbly and cute. Sorry for whiplash.**

**Disclaimer: Despite several fun dreams that I can, Glee is not something I can call my own.**

* * *

Chapter Five: Friendly Acquaintances 

_Two days later…_

Rachel stretched her arms out after rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. She glanced at the clock beside her and her jaw nearly dropped in disbelief. It was 9:51 in the morning, she hadn't sleep in this much since she started grade school!

She dropped her arms to her side and shook her head at herself. She knew it had been a bad idea to let Connor take her to her first ever night club. It had taken nearly an hour just to arrive, and only four minutes for Connor to lose her while chasing after a girl in a short skirt. She wandered around the rest of the night being hit on by strangers and drinking punch, which she's pretty sure was spiked thanks to her blotched memory.

In fact she can't quite remember how she got home come to think of it. Which is _never_ a good sign.

"Connor?" She swung her feet over the bed and flew out her bedroom door, ran down the hall then slung his open. "Connor?" There was a large shape under the bedcovers. Maybe he hadn't woken up yet. She strut across the room and through the covers up. Sure enough, there was a figure curled up, still asleep. But the figure was much thinner, more feminine, and her skin was several shades darker…

"Santana?" The girl's head shot up quicker than a bullet and nearly hit the back wall.

She heard Connor's laughter from the far corner of the room. She stared at him incredulously. "So you know her?" He questioned, after taking a sip of water. Rachel's eyebrows rose.

"She goes to my school Connor. She's in my Glee club."

Santana spoke up. "Wait, wait, wait. How do _you two _know each other?" Rachel turned back to face her.

"We're cousins." Santana looked on disbelievingly.

"Cousins?" She repeated rather saucily for someone lying on a bed half-naked.

"Her parents are away, I'm watching her." Connor explained. Santana's eyebrows rose even higher. "She's used to waking up and finding people in my bed." Her eyes narrowed and she sat straight up in bed.

"Good to know." She tossed her legs carelessly over and took several long strides out the door.

* * *

Rachel tied her hair up in a ponytail as she waltzed down the stairs, nearly tripping when she saw the hunched over figure at her dining room table. "Santana? What are you still doing here?" The tan girl suddenly stopped shaking, her shoulders went rigid and she slowly turned around to face her. There were dark circles under her eyes, and trails of mascara going down her face.

Rachel froze in horror when she realized Santana Lopez had been _crying_. Actual tears. Not the fake ones she was so used to letting off the get what she wanted. Genuine sadness.

Then she said something that caught Rachel even more off guard. "Do you think I'm a bitch?"

Rachel open and closed her mouth several times, unsure of how to answer. She made fun of her every chance she got, insulted her constantly, and made sure everyone else did the same. So honestly? Yes, she did. "Well, I, um…"

Santana scoffed, the old Santana finally returning. "Of course you do, I'm awful to you." Rachel was suddenly nervous she wasn't the only psychic in the room. Santana turned her head back around and Rachel made her way down the remaining stairs, taking a seat next the girl. "It's just a fact of life I guess." Santana continued silently. "Santana Lopez is a bitch. She expresses no emotion other than sarcasm and if she does, the end of the world is approaching because she doesn't have feelings. Because she doesn't care. And nobody believes her if she says she does."

Rachel listened knowingly before interrupting. "You're just talking yourself in circles." She said pityingly to the poor girl. "I would know, I do it all the time." A half real, half sarcastic laugh left her lips before her face fell dejectedly again.

"I guess I bring it on myself." No _that_ is something Rachel could relate to.

"No, not really." She told her. "I used to think that every time I got slushied. When I really thought about why all those people slushy me, and make fun of me, all I could figure out was it was because I was annoying, and unpopular, and I had no friends. And of course I like to sing, and… occasionally think and say out loud that I'm better than everyone at our school. So automatically I just deserved whatever I got, because it was my own fault that I was all those things, so obviously they were going to express their opinions. But then I realized, in a way _everybody's_ annoying._ Everyone _has flaws, but that doesn't mean they deserve to suffer constantly from them. And instead of punishing them for something they as a human cannot help, you _could_ be trying to help them be better. I mean, that's the only real reason people turn out to be awful, bad treatment and neglect."

"I don't see where you're going with this Man Hands." Rachel let the cruel nickname slide off her as easily as a slushy.

"You just need someone who can help Santana. Somebody who understands." She finished, laying a hand on her shoulder comfortingly.

She shrugged it off almost immediately. "You sound like my therapist." Rachel nodded.

"I sound like mine too. I think I channel her spiritually when giving these sort of talks. It's a little weird, but it helps get my point across." Santana stared at her for a long moment, as if trying to decide if she was joking or not. Settling on the latter, she just shrugged, and flipped her hair over her shoulder.

Decided their miniscule heart-to-heart was over, she asked, "Do you need a ride to school?"

Santana looked like she wanted to mock her with a snarky comment, or simply roll her eyes and walk out the door but instead she just shrugged again and answered, "Whatever."

Rachel smiled as she grabbed her keys because she couldn't help but like that was progress.

* * *

Rachel slammed her locker door shut after pulling out the necessary books for third period. She then set off down the hall, ignoring any type of looks from Finn.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Karofksy coming up behind her, slushy in hand. She winced mentally as her brain went into overdrive, seeking for different ways to escape. But all passageways were blocked either by traffic or Jacob, as she was not quite desperate enough for that. But the moment Karofksy was coming head on for Rachel she felt an arm grab hers and jerk her out of the line of fire.

She turned to find her savor in the form of her old nemesis. Santana looped her arm in Rachel's and carefully weaved their way through the crowded hall. Rachel was surprised to see them all part and move out of the way for them to go through. She wondered if that's what being popular felt like.

For the rest of the day Santana would pick her up after class, sometimes with Brittany, sometimes without. And after explaining to the blonde that Rachel would be walking with them from now on, Rachel was left out of most of their conversation.

The times when it was just Rachel and Santana were a little bit awkward. For her at least. Santana didn't say anything, so neither did Rachel, though they occasionally commented on the fashion choice of the students occupying the halls, and Glee was mentioned more than once.

But when lunch time came Santana saved at seat for her at the Cheerio table, and effectively blocked her from all cruel insults from anyone on her team. She just basically sent them a glare every time they opened their mouth, to which they immediately close it, which showed Rachel just how much all the girls feared Santana.

She wondered if this made then friends.

* * *

Rachel walked into Glee with Brittany and Santana on either arm. She laughed as she watched the different expressions on the various faces of the Glee club. Kurt did a double take while Mercedes mouth hung wide open. Santana sent Rachel a little smirk before finding a seat, and patting the one beside her for Rachel.

"Since when did you guys become friends?" Puck asked nonchalantly as he strummed his guitar. Just those words made Rachel tense up all over. Would Santana answer just as casually, or flat out deny they were ever friends?

Brittany answered first. "Since Santana told me to. And anyway, Rachel's really nice and she has a really pretty voice." Rachel tucked her chin in and mumbled a quiet 'thank you' to Brittany. Puck turned to Santana, who was admiring her nails.

"Since this morning." She said shrugging, as if Rachel's day didn't depend on the answer.

"But you guys hate each other." Quinn piped up from two seats over. "How are you _friends_?"

Santana turned her head to face Quinn. "You got a problem with it Fabray?" She asked saucily, rolling her shoulder intimidating. Quinn immediately retreated, turning back to Kurt. Santana flipped her pony-tail one last time before turning back the Rachel, who was smiling to herself somewhat smugly.

* * *

"So what do you say?" Connor asked mockingly as he picked his helmet off the motorcycle.

"Thank you Connor, for helping me make friends and such. And also for watching me while my dads were away." Connor smiled and ruffled her hair before stepping onto the bike.

"See you later, Diva." Rachel watched as he drove off into the distance, leaving her alone with an empty house and a sparkly pink helmet, which she had placed lovingly in her room. She idly messed around the house and made dinner for her and her parents when they arrived home.

The doorbell rang around three hours after Connor had left. She skipped to the door happily and hugged each of her fathers as they walked into the house.

"I made dinner." She exclaimed happily after taking their bags upstairs. "Dad nodded quietly and walked into the dining room. She turned questioningly to her daddy, who merely shrugged his shoulders.

"It's been a long day sweetie, your father and I are very tired. Thank you for making dinner though." Rachel nodded and faked a smile like the good little girl she was. She then followed him to their meal, trying to swallow the feeling that something was wrong.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, I'm not that good at writing Santana, but I do LOVE that character and completely adore her HBIC shoulder rolls. (See 'The Boy is Mine' for examples) Plus, like I said, I need Rachel to have a friend, I really think Rachel, Santana, and Brittany can rock McKinley for all it's worth.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	6. Flawed Perfection

** PLEASE READ!**

** Okay, so, this chapter is really long, and doesn't have much Puck, but I had fun having Rachel interact with some of the other characters. ALSO PLEASE NOTE. Before wards, I had no idea what Rachel's dads names were, but I have been informed they are Hiram and Leroy, so just forgot anything in earlier chapters that said otherwise. Kay, that's all I really had that was important to say.**

** Also, I am completely caught up with my 'wrote ahead' plan, so this one was on the fly. I'm happy I got it out on time but things have been hectic lately, so don't be surprised if the next chapter is a day late. Also, don't be surprised if there are lots of errors. This is un-beta'd people. **

** Also, don't be surprised when I tell you, I DON'T OWN GLEE! : Backwards Disclaimer (cuz we're cool like that) **

* * *

Chapter Six: Flawed Perfection

_A week later…_

"Ray, Britt and I were gonna hit the mall Friday? You coming?" Rachel turned back to face Santana.

"I don't think I can. My Aunt Barbara's getting married, and she's having a bachelorette party this weekend." Santana raised her eyebrows.

"And you're actually going?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't really like my Aunt Barbara that much, but she's having her party in New York, I had to beg my fathers for hours to let me go alone sense neither of them can take any time off work but-"

Brittany cut her off dreamily. "Will there be any cute guys there?"

"Britt, it's a _bachelorette_ party. That means all girls. Remember the TV show?" Santana corrected her as Brittany nodded her head.

"Yeah but, she's going to be alone in New York, isn't that like, the perfect opportunity?" She explained pointedly. Rachel watched in horror as Santana froze, the wheels turning slowly in her brain, when she turned back to Rachel with a wicked smile on her face.

"No."

* * *

"Hummel! We need your help." Kurt turned in surprise as Santana sought him out next glee rehearsal, dragging Rachel behind her. Santana spared no time. "As much as I hate to rely on you, this is mission impossible and I need as much help as I can get." Kurt rose his eyebrow in confusion, waiting for her to elaborate. "Rachel's going to be roughing it in New York, and Brit in I are forcing her to take the opportunity to find a new man." Rachel tried to stop herself from blushing red as Finn and Noah's heads perked up in the back of the room.

Kurt however, was still in the dark. "So…?"

Santana rolled her eyes. "You're the only one who's gotten Berry into any clothes other than argyle. So, we're enlisting your help for a makeover. Not that you have a choice-"

"I'm in!" Kurt interjected without a second thought. "Makeovers are like crack to me." Across the room, Quinn smirked knowingly.

Rachel's eyes widened. "Wait, Santana, the last time Kurt gave me a makeover-"

"That was different." Kurt insisted as he crossed his arms over his chest. "And I think you know how." His eye twitched to the side where Finn was openly staring at the foursome. Their eyes connected for a minute, until Rachel turned her head away angrily.

Santana gave Kurt a good one over before saying, "Just so we're clear, this doesn't give you permission to tell me what to do. _I'm _the one in charge of this project, so I don't give a damn about your Gucci or fashion week courses, you don't get to boss us around."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Santana took Kurt's hand a shook it firmly while Brittany clapped her hands together in excitement. Kurt, accepting he'd be spending lots of time with them until Rachel finally left, took a seat on the piano bench. "So do we have a plan of action?"

"Shopping after school, then, of course, training, she needs to learn how to dress herself properly _without_ our help." Rachel scoffed in outrage, and Kurt just nodded his head.

"I dress myself just fine." Rachel muttered sullenly as she slunk back against the chair, looking like a sulking child. She fingered the edge of her skirt as she added, "And I like plaid." As an afterthought.

"You and grandmothers everywhere." Kurt said, sarcastically.

"Have you picked out a dress for the ceremony?" Santana shot at her, changing the subject. Rachel gave one last menacing look at Kurt before nodding in her direction. "Describe it to me."

"Well, it has an over the shoulder strap-" Santana cut her off immediately and whipped her head around. Rachel dodged the flying ponytail as she heard Kurt and Santana mumble their plans. "We're going strapless, and maybe a soft blue…" "Really? I was thinking more white, or oh, maybe a pink?" "Mock-two piece? That way she could have both colors." "Depends on the accessories…"

Rachel watched in disbelief as they argued over her outfit plans. "Guys? Can I be in on this too? It is me you're talking about." Kurt waved his in her direction to shush her. After a few more minutes of deliberating in a somewhat huddle like position, Santana broke her head away and turned to Rachel with a business-like look on her face.

"Okay. Here's the deal. We're going strapless, dusty rose satin,"

Kurt cut in. "Think pleated."

"Floor length."

"We're debating on pink or white designer heels."

"A simple pearl necklace?"

"Sounds good."

"Elegant bun or curls?"

"Maybe bun with a single curl hanging? It's like flawed perfection."

Santana smirked. "All we need is a simple pair of matching earrings and it's hello jealousy."

Rachel, whose mind was still reeling from the tennis match of designer clothes, only caught up with them at about the last two words. Her brain kicked in at the mention of a musical fact. "Hey Jealousy? Isn't that a song?"

"Gin Blossoms, yeah." Rachel's eyes shot to the side and rested on the Finn, who looked as if he had just realized he said that out loud. Santana and Kurt quieted for a second as their eyes connected briefly, Rachel turning away first. Of course Finn would be the one to answer her question. Over the summer she had listened to a lot of Finn's iPod, which contained more Journey and Guns N' Roses then she ever would have guessed. His musical knowledge consisted of Classic Rock, and not much else.

Still, it was the first real contact she'd made with him sense… _that_. She's not sure if she should be thankful it wasn't something more, or disappointed.

"Is Brittany coming to this?" Rachel asked, trying to change the subject. Kurt unwillingly tore his eyes away from Finn as Santana answered.

"She can't, she's babysitting her cousin." Kurt raised his eyebrows.

"Is that safe?" Santana shrugged and examined her nails as if it didn't really matter all that much.

"Maybe not. Who cares? She's great with little kids. They get along really well."

Kurt and Rachel shared a look as Kurt returned with, "I'm sure they can relate." Santana just rolled her eyes.

"Don't make me kick you out of these plans, Hummel. You're actually cooler than your constant need to flaunt yourself like New Marc Jacobs suggests. Though I'll deny it if you ever bring it up again."

Rachel absentminded tapped her fingernails against the piano as she listened to the two of them continue to argue. Two independent divas stuck working on the same project in a limited amount of space. Tonight was looking fun.

* * *

Rachel was rushed out of the school building by an impatient Santana as Kurt started his car. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Puck's car near the curb, no doubt waiting for her. Santana tugged on her sweater.

"Come on!" Rachel shook her head.

"Hold on a second, I have to go talk to Noah." Santana's eyes rose suspiciously as Rachel jerked her way out of Santana's grip and strutted over to the car. "Hello Noah." Noah ignored her greeted and tilted his head to the side, casting a glance at Santana who was angrily tapping her foot. Rachel sighed. "Sorry, but Santana decided to take me prisoner today, so I won't be needing a ride."

"Why are you friends all the sudden?" He asked bluntly, turning his head back to Rachel.

"Well," She struggled to find words to put it delicately. "We were in a situation which, given the circumstances, happened to force us to be in limited amount of space which made us understand the other a bit more. While I don't think she necessarily considers me a friend yet, I'd like to hope she doesn't hate me like before."

"Human words."

Rachel narrowed her eyes. "She slept with my cousin, I woke up and found her in his bed. Then she started crying so I talked to her for a bit, and she swung me around on her arm all throughout the day."

Puck looked even more confused than before. "Santana cried? Like actually tears? Were they at least, like… made of acid or something?" Rachel glared at him disapprovingly as he shook his head. "So what does she want you for today?"

Rachel sighed once again. "I have my aunt's wedding in New York to attend to, so Kurt and Santana are helping me prepare. This decision of course, was against my will."

Puck laughed. "I remember the last time Kurt gave you a makeover…" His sentence trailed off as he got an evil smirk on his face.

"Stop remembering it!" Rachel nearly shouted as Puck broke into hysterics. "I was… under the wrong impression that-" She began stammering for an excuse, but was cut off (or possibly saved) from answering when Santana shouted, "B, get your ass over here!"

Kurt's car pulled up behind Puck's and Santana opened the door expectantly. Rachel huffed and started over to the car, just catching a "See you later B." from Puck before slamming the door.

* * *

"Alright." Santana started out, throwing another magazine in Rachel's direction, who over time finally learned to catch them. "Say I picked out these DKNY jeans with some black, four inch R. Laurens, which designer shirt would match?" She and Santana had been playing this game for the last hour as Kurt tore apart her closet and added in the heap load of clothes they had bought at the mall, but he was taking so much time she was nearly positive he was color-coding it.

"I don't see why it matters San, not only do I not own this stuff, I would have to save up for about a year to actually afford it!" Truth was, her dads were very expensive lawyers, and she had a golden credit card made out in her name, but that doesn't me she goes around spending it own five hundred dollar shoes.

Santana opened her mouth to retort but was cut off by Kurt's shriek of disgust. "Really, Rachel? Do I have to throw out every single article of clothing that you own?"

"What?" Rachel shot out of bed and over to her walk in closet to find Kurt with a nearly full garbage bag by his feet and a grey sweater in his hand. "Kurt, you can't throw out my clothes!"

He scoffed. "I'm not throwing them out; I'm just strongly suggesting that _you_ do. This however," Kurt replied, holding out the sweater to her with only two fingers, as if he was afraid it carried a disease. "I'm considering burning this and dancing on the ashes. This color looks like cat barf." He drew in his hand again to inspect it before gagging. "Good lord, please tell me those aren't gingerbread men on the collar."

Rachel snatched it out of his hand and held it up against her chest. "My dad's like to buy me decorative sweaters for Half-Christmas Half-Hanukah celebration. This was Christmas 2006!"

"Well that explains the candy-striped one I threw out first. I guess I didn't notice this one because the color is so bland it ended up blending in with the wall paint. Which by the way, is just as awful."

"I-"

"Anyway," Kurt continued, practically unfazed by Rachel's interruption. "I took all the clothes we got at the mall today and separated them into blouses, t-shirts, long-sleeved, etc, as well as skinny jeans, shorts, skirts, dresses, shoes, accessories… it's all organized."

Rachel watched in silent awe as Kurt showed her around her closet, pointing out all the different sections as if it was his clothes instead of hers. "Is this like an obsessive thing for you?" She asked uncertainly.

Kurt turned sharp on his heel. "Look Princess, you have your insane singing deal, and I have this. You asked me for help-"

"Santana did." Rachel interrupted.

"You asked me for help," Kurt repeated. "And I am determined to make this perfect." Kurt's as narrowed for a minute then widened again. "Face it, you're the Barbie doll my dad refused to get me, and Mercedes forbids me to treat her like. Tina won't wear anything that's not black, Finn's a guy, and you can forget about all the Cheerios." Rachel once again opened her mouth to reply when Kurt cut her off for the third time. "Let's move on to make-up." Before going back into her bedroom, dragging Rachel's arm with him.

Santana smiled mockingly. "Look at Hummel, finally coming out of the closet." Kurt rolled his eyes next to her.

"Forgive me if I don't find your sense of humor as hilarious as some." Rachel ignored the bickering from the two as she plopped down on the bed, dropping her head on Santana's shoulder.

"San, I'm tired, and Kurt's being fanatical." Santana patted her on the head comfortingly.

"Here B, drink some red bull." Rachel wrinkled her nose in disgust, but took a sip of the drink anyway. She was tired, sweaty, and bored. And it was still only 11:30.

* * *

"Rach! You have to shove harder!" Santana complained as Rachel tried desperately to push down her suitcase, the insanely full contents refusing to cooperate. Rachel mumbled something unintelligible. "What?" She groaned and fell backwards onto the bed.

"I'm trying San, but it's four in the morning and I can barely keep my eyes open." Santana growled in annoyance before finally sitting on the suitcase and trying to close it. She reached for the zipper and Rachel heard a small but miraculous zipping sound and nearly cried out in joy. "Did it work?"

Santana sighed heavily. "No. We need a heavier weight. Kurt!"

"Hey!" Kurt shouted offendedly from down the stairs. "I heard that whole sentence!"

"Pssh. You no it's true. You've got hips like a pear." Kurt cracked open to door to find Santana sinking deep into a bean bag chair and Rachel nearly passed out on the bed. He walked over and sat down next to her and handed her a freshly made Frappachino, no sugar.

"Drink up sweetie, only three more hours."

"I don't see why we have to do this tonight." Rachel grumbled, feeling somewhat revived after a large sip. "Packing wasn't on your list this morning."

"But that was before we knew you were leaving in two days!" Santana said, backing up to the far side of the room.

Rachel raised her eyebrows in confusion. "San, what are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" Santana fixed her gazed determinedly on the oversized travel bag, then bound across the room in one leap, pouncing on it. She hit with a loud thud, then quickly gripp the zipper sliding it around all four corners to the other side before screeching out in shock and accomplishment. "Ha! Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha!"

Rachel grinned widely. "You sound like a crazy person."

"This requires celebrating! Rachel, where are those Swedish fish you were snacking on?"

"They're-" Rachel's face dropped within seconds and groaned. "In the bag."

Santana flashed Rachel her best 'What the fuck?' face. "Shit."

* * *

Rachel lugged her heavy bag down the stairs after spending the entire day recovering from her hellish, yet somewhat fun night with Kurt and Santana. She had everything she was taking with her propped up near the door and was just leaning back to appreciate her work when the door flew open and hit her full in the face. She stumbled backwards in pain as her dad glanced at her briefly mumbling 'sorry' before storming into the house, following by her other father.

Rachel pulled her hand away from her face and was horrified to see blood coming out. She wasn't sure if it was broken, but the door had hit her head on, and her nose was a pretty big target to miss.

"Leroy, let's just talk about this rationally. There's no need to stomp about, you hurt Rachel." **(A/N: If you have not read my earlier note, please do so now.)**

Rachel watched, completely stunned at as her father whipped around, closing his eyes for a second, trying not to lose his control in front of her. "What's going on?" She asked timidly.

"I'm sorry you're hurt Rachel. That was an accident." His gaze met his husband, who stared at him sorrowfully for a long minute before turning his head back to Rachel.

"Rachel, can you go up to your room please? Turn on some music or something." Rachel blinked several times.

"But Daddy, Connor's going to be here soon to take me to New York." Her Father shook his head.

"You're not going." Rachel's jaw fell open in shock.

"What do you mean I'm not going?"

"I mean you're not going. You're not allowed." Her father said sternly. "Aunt Barbara has about a million other relatives to come to her party. She won't miss you."

Rachel stammered uncontrollably, her eyes traveling back in and forth between her two fathers. "But, my I bought new clothes and everything. M-my friends even came over to help and everything! I've gone crazy planning this!"

"Rachel." Her dad said from across the room, his gaze unwillingly flickering from Leroy to her. "Now's not the time." Her mouth dropped open again. Her dad's eyes pleaded with her. "Please, go up to your room." He paused for a moment before adding, "take your bags with you."

Rachel stood shock still before a moment before moving toward to door again, picking up her bags and once more dragging them up the stairs. She slammed her door before dropping them in the center of the room and putting two fingers on her nose, testing the damage. Then she sunk as far back as her chair would allow her, plugged in her head phones and tried to drown out the yelling.

* * *

**A/N: WARNING. I'm warning you right now that this angst you experienced at the end her is (ironically) only the beginning! Prepare for major angst next chapter! Yes, readers SIL is even considering changing the genre for this next chapter. I hope you enjoyed the teeth rotting fluff while it lasted, because it's not coming back for two more chapters. Also, Finn makes an unexpected return. I know what you're thinking, 'ewwh!' But I assure you, it is necessary for Rachel's growth. Once again, predictions are accepted! Also, reviews! Greatly excepted. Thanks. Wow, it think this chapter is the longest one I've ever wrote, it's even longer than most of my one shots. But now I'm procrastinating putting this online by posting this insanely long and entirely unnecessary A/N. Okay well, bye!**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	7. Don't Expect Too Much

**It just occurred to me that my timeline doesn't make that much sense. Oh well. Too late. I'm not really that good at editing my stories once I published them, because of my computer, if I make any changes I have to republish them all over again, which gives people extra alerts and I get hate mail and less subscriptions. So to save people from that, I'm just going to tell you now not to try and make sense of my timeline. You won't be able to.**

**Also, I'm sorry this was late, but this chapter was SO HARD for me to write. Going into it I was positive I was going to add something in at the end, and I was not at all prepared for the big dramatic scene I was going to write, so the entire way through I was freaking out about the last couple scenes. But I just could **_**not do**_** it. ****Angst storm is now officially delayed. *****whew***

**Disclaimer: If I owned Glee I would twist it so much that nobody else would like it but me. *sigh***

* * *

Chapter Seven: Don't Expect Too Much

_Two days later…_

"Now they fight. _All_ the time. And I have no idea what they're even fighting about and when I try to ask them they just send me up to my room." Puck listened quietly as Rachel told him her problems. "I'm just so… worried, Noah, I don't understand." He nodded to himself and slowly removed one hand from the wheel, and took her hand in his.

She tried not to gasp out loud, or anything of the sort. Never once had he held her hand, not even when they had dated. He said it was a chick-type thing to do, and he was to badass for it. Sure, he walked arm in arm with her down the hall, but this was different. It felt, comforting, soft. It was a whole new level of intimacy that she wasn't aware Puck was able to show.

Her eyes drifted from their intertwined hands to his face, where she saw him staring at her. There was warmth in his gaze, and when the corners of her mouth turned up slowly, he flashed her a lazy grin.

Then all the sudden there was a loud honking from outside the car and Noah's head snapped back on the road. "Shit!" Rachel watched bewildered as her swerved far to the right in order to avoid hitting the car to the left of him. He got back in the center lane and gave the largest sigh of relief she'd ever heard.

She then promptly burst into a fit of hysterics. He looked at her like she was on some type of illegal drug, and between laughs she managed to say, "The look on your face!" He rolled his eyes and turned back to the road. But out of the corner of her eye she saw his lips curl up ever so slightly, because he was just happy she was laughing.

* * *

Santana patted the seat next to her when Rachel walked through the door with Puck. She smiled happily and gladly took the seat next to her. Santana smirked in Puck's direction, which he just shrugged off and went to sit in the back by Mike. Santana's head whipped around.

"Is something going down with you and Puck?"

"You're a really terrible whisperer." Santana's eyes widened at the lack of denial, and Rachel quickly realized her mistake. "I mean no! He just gives me rides because my cars in the shop."

Santana nodded believingly. "Okay. So if your cars in the shop, what did we drive to the mall yesterday?" Opps. She had forgotten about that.

"Carpooling." She spit out. "It's… good for the environment, and it saves polar bears." Santana didn't skip a beat.

"Bullshit." Brittany's face fell from next to Santana.

"Aww, San, I like polar bears. They're cute." Santana's face softened as she turned over to Brittany.

"I do too, B. Remember I got you a stuffed one for your birthday?" Brittany nodded excitedly.

"That was really cool. It had a card on it that confused me though. I said something about polar bears really being black. But hello? Their fur is _white_. The people who wrote that must be really stupid." Santana smiled and nodded, and Brittany's attention was quickly caught by Kurt, who was flashing his shiny new watch in her direction.

Santana leaned in as discretely as possible. "I know I was the one who convinced you to move on, but we were heads over heels for Hudson and he broke your heart. Shouldn't you recover first?"

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Please. He did not break my heart." Not _really. _"He just disappointed me. Not only by cheating on me, but by his actions that followed. I'm just thankful nothing more happened. I know he and Quinn have history, so at least he kissed her instead of sleeping with her." Santana's eyes widen guiltily. "Not that it matters, it's still cheating." Santana gave a nervous nod, her face looking conflicted. "What is it San?" Before Santana could reply she was cut off by Mr. Schuester.

"Alright guys, before we get started, Finn wants to sing something for us today." Every eye turned to the back row. "Come on up." Finn smiled widely as he walked up to the front of the room and signaled the band to start playing. As the familiar tune rang in her head, Rachel tried not to gape, or acknowledge to ten people staring holes into her, because they knew too.

_Tell me do you think it'd be alright_

_If I could just crash here tonight,_

_As you see I'm in no shape for drivin'_

_And any way I've got no place to go_

The song really had no relevance to their situation. Like, absolutely none. In fact, it seemed like he was just singing it because she had brought it up a couple days ago. She wasn't sure how to feel.

_And you know it might not be that bad_

_You were the best I ever had_

_I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago_

_I might not be alone_

Alright, maybe there was a little relevance, she admitted to herself. Finn didn't strut up to where she was sitting, or sing on her ear like he did when he sang Jessie's Girl, he was smart enough to know not to.

_Tomorrow we can drive around this town_

_And let the cops chase us around_

_The past is gone but something might be found to take its place_

She bit her lip. She was always a sucker for a guy who would sing. But she couldn't give in this pathetic attempt. She had sworn to herself she was done with this. But he just looked so sincere.

_Listen to my heart,_

_There's only one thing I couldn't start…_

* * *

After the bell for after school activities rang, she abandoned Santana and leapt nimbly out of the door to avoid being intercepted by Puck. She ran and ran, all the way to the girls' bathroom. She took a long look in the mirror, trying to reason with herself. She sighed cupped her hands together a took a deep sip of water, something she always did when she was sad or nervous. She re-exited the bathroom and made her way down the hall to Finn's locker.

She tried to convince herself that she wasn't giving in. No, she was just going to talk to him. It would be simple, easy. If only she knew what she was going to say.

Rachel took a deep breath and turned the corner, nearly running now. She stopped at the fork in the hall, once she took this left turn there was no going back. She knew he'd be waiting for her.

Then she heard a quiet sniffling coming from the right. She peered down and saw Brittany alone at her locker, a single tear going down her face. Rachel was instantly at her side. "What's wrong Brittany?" Brittany sniffled again.

"Mr. Waddles is being mean today. He bit me!" Rachel wasn't sure if she heard her correctly at first. But Brittany continued to whimper until Rachel finally had to ask.

"Who's Mr. Waddles?" Brittany pointed a finger at her locker before drawing her hand back again to nurse her bite. Rachel peered in Brittany's dark locker, poking her nose in slightly, before she heard a loud snapping sound and pulled her head back. Inside her locked there was a dark green, almost black shell with a horned head poking out.

Mr. Waddles was a turtle. A very dried out, angry looking turtle at that.

Brittany cried. "I can't believe he bit me. I've been so nice to him, I gave him food, a bath, a home, and he bit me!" Rachel placed a pitying hand on the girl.

"That's because he's a snapping turtle Brit. It's in his nature." Brittany's heartbroken expression was replaced with a look of confusion.

"So he's a musician? He's not very good. No wonder he's so grumpy."Rachel had to try and stop herself from laughing at loud at the blonde girl's confusion. She racked her brain to find a simple way to explain it to her.

"Well Brittany, he's very grateful of your hospitality, but he's homesick and he misses his family." Brittany nodded sadly, finally understanding. Rachel smiled in relief. "Why don't we get Principal Figgins and he'll take the turtle back home." Brittany looked horrified.

"No! I have to at least say goodbye! Then I promised I'll bring him home! Rachel please let me do it!"

Rachel sighed. "Alright, but you have to put him straight back after you said goodbye." Brittany grinned again.

"Thanks Rachel, you're the best. Finn's really stupid for being mean to you. San says guys do that when they know they're not good enough." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "I don't really know what she was talking about, but then she said he was really bad in bed, so I guess that's what she meant."

Rachel laughed. "And where'd she get that idea?" Brittany looked confused, so she elobrated. "Finn and Santana never had sex. They only went on like one date." Brittany's lips went into an 'o'.

"Oh well, Coach wanted us to be more like Madonna and she told us to date a younger man, so Santana went for Finn and took his virginity. It was a really Madonna move, she totally wrote a song about it." Rachel blinked several times and stood in shock. Inside the locker Mr. Waddles snapped a few more times, drawing Brittany's attention. "Oh, I should probably take Mr. Waddles' back now." Rachel watched silently as Brittany coaxed the animal into her backpack then took off down the hallway, waving her hand behind her.

Rachel didn't wave back.

* * *

Rachel was ready to burst into tears. Puck had already left, her cell phone was dead and it looked like it was going to rain soon. But she walked all the way home anyway, sitting on the biggest cloud of disappointment sense Finn had cheated on her. It seemed ironic she was here again.

He lied to her. So had she. That's not what she was angry about. But it seemed like just as she was actually considering forgiving him she finds out, from _Brittany_. It just wasn't fair. It was like fate wanted them to fail miserably. And Santana? Santana had lied too. Her first real friend in the world was to selfish to tell her that what she had done.

Of course, it was Santana too. What attractive guy _hadn't_ that girl slept with? But it was just too much. As soon as she gets a friend, in her hour of need, of course she gets let down again.

She supposes she should have known. But she feels surprised anyway.

Rachel took a moment to enter the supermarket, purchasing a tube of her favorite ice cream and prepared for a long day of recovery. The man at the counter rung her up as there was a clap of thunder for outside.

"Lovely weather huh?" She pretended to smile, tapping her foot impatiently as he swiped her credit card. "I hate days like this, when you know it's going to storm but it just refuses to start raining. You should start heading home before it does." Rachel nodded before snatching the card and bag out of his hands and nearly bolting out the door.

She ran all the way home, the ice cream hitting her side repeatedly. She panted on her doorstep, pulling the door open slowly to reveal her two fathers, sitting calmly on the sofa, waiting for her. Her eyebrows arched in confusion as she set the ice cream on the table. He father looked her up and down, eyeing the bag before sighing and motioning for her to sit down. "We need to talk."

Right at that moment, the rain started to pour.

* * *

**A/N: Not really much to say hear. Again, the next chapter might be late, because it will be undoubtedly hard to write. I will be plunging headfirst into the Angst storm, so wish me good luck,.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	8. The Final Word

**Wow. Reading your reviews just killed me because they were all so hopeful and ignorant of the horror I am throwing upon this story. It made me feel so bad for what I'm about to do. So bad, I almost didn't do it. Almost. **

**I am truly sorry, but it was the whole point of this story and I already have a plan that I can't abandon now. And, if I took this out, the whole first chapter of this story would make zero sense and have absolutely no point. So yeah, I'm sorry. So I added a little Puck in even though I didn't think I was going to. :D Yay, one thing to look forward to!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, but my mom says I'm still cool.**

* * *

Showface Eight: The Final Word

_The Next Morning…_

She was in shock. Her lungs felt like ice, it almost hurt to breathe. But somehow she managed to grip the water glass tightly in her hands, her fingers grazing over the gold stars as she tried desperately not to cry now that she had her make up on. She breathed in uneasily and took a long hard sip, its contents nearly empty when she pulled away.

She heard the honking of a car horn outside. No. She couldn't see Puck. Not today, she had to pull herself together first. She whipped out her phone and sent some half-wit excuse. She was seriously considering just ditching school all together. She knew it was bad to procrastinate; she still had to yell at Santana, demand Finn for an explanation, and… spread word. But right now, she just wanted to lie down and forget the world.

Her door banged open causing Rachel to nearly jump five feet in the air. Puck stood in the doorway, giving her a quick smirk before his face turned serious again.

"Noah! I told you I was sick!" She said, still startled.

"I know." He crossed the room to where she was sitting on her bed. "I'm just calling you out on your bullshit."Rachel pressed her lips together.

"I appreciate it, but I really would just like to be alone right now." Rachel returned her voice stiff.

Puck appraised her for a moment, and then feigned offense. "So you're turning down my friendship, Berry? I'm hurt." Her eyes went cold.

"I'm serious." He blinked several times at the lack of any kindness in her voice. He had never heard that tone on her before, and to be honest, he didn't like it.

"What's your problem?" He asked tactlessly, frowning at the deep circles under her eyes and the angry expression that seemed frozen on her face. A sudden thought dawned upon him. "Did something happen with Finn?" Her body shook with sobs.

"Yes, and no. Something did happen with Finn but," She wiped her tears out of her eyes. "That's not what I'm worried about." His eyebrows arched as he waited for her to elaborate. She looked hesitant, her eyes traveling slightly before landing on the clock and pushing him away. "You're going to be late. Just, tell Mr. Schue I'm not feeling well."

"But you have to come to Glee-"

"I'll come to Glee." She said, cutting him off. "I just, I'll come later okay. I need a while to think." He nodded as she practically shoved him out the door before falling to her feet. He could hear her crying from the other side of the door and he almost wanted to go in there and help her, but he wasn't very good with crying women, or making them feel better, he usually just made them feel worse. She he considered it a favor when he walked out of the door and back to his car, wondering what was wrong.

* * *

Rachel took a deep, shallow breath as she stood outside the choir room, listening to the rest of the club sing Tubthumping. Even then fun song didn't make her feel any better, and she suddenly wished for another glass of water.

Rachel Berry was about to go onstage and give the hardest performance of her life.

She heard laughter from inside as they all settled down again. "That was really good guys! Why don't we discuss choreography for "Don't Stop Me Now?" There were groans from all around the classroom, then a sudden silence. A silence which she usually filled with a 'should-be-motivation' speech.

"Wait, where's Rachel?" She stopped breathing. That was her cue. The curtain rose as she entered the room, clearing her throat with a quiet, 'here'. Puck's eyes widened as he saw her, surprised she actually showed up, while just about everyone else looked shocked she showed up late.

Mr. Schue's eyes widened. "Rachel? Is everything okay? Are you hurt? You're late."

"Nobody's hurt." She said, her head still turned downwards. She nearly scowled at the obvious weakness in her voice, which was suddenly powdery soft. "I just…" She cleared her throat again. "I have something I need to say." Her voice came out stronger. Mr. Schuester nodded as her took a chair and motioned for the other kids to quiet down.

This was it. Her big speech, her time to shine. She squeezed her eyes shut for a second and tried to pretend like none of this was real. It was just a script for a play. And this was just a heartbreaking scene that would get her a Tony. She just needed to open her mouth and dazzle the crowd, then it would be all over. She felt the spotlight's warmth as she took a small step forward onto the very middle of her imaginary stage. She could her the drum roll playing in the background as she mustered up all of courage and finally spoke.

"I can't be in Glee anymore."

She was pulled harshly back into the present as a cry of 'what?' rang out, and Mr. Schue's face blanched. There was an eruption from all around the room and it seemed each person had a different thing to say, steadily getting crueler as they went.

"Guys! Just… listen. I _want_ to be. But…" She sighed pathetically as she searched for something to do with her hands. She had never felt this self conscious before, with all their eyes turned in her direction. "My fathers have been fighting a lot lately, a lot of things I'd rather not like to share with you happened and… well, some changes are necessary." She looked at her shoes again. She took a deep breath again. "Dad wasn't happy because most of our money comes from my other father, who's a lawyer. But that's causing them to spend a lot of time apart." Rachel wasn't sure how much she was comfortable sharing with them, so she skimmed over some of the details, trying to get to the main point. "Then he got another job offer. The only problem is it's not in Ohio." It took them all a second to process this, but they still didn't understand. "Daddy took the job anyway, which Dad wasn't happy about, so they fought over it for a while until Dad finally told him to take the job. But he wasn't coming with him."

The room grew deathly quiet before Puck asked, "Your dads are getting divorced?" They all studied her for a minute, gauging her reaction.

"No, they've made that very clear. They're just, spending a little time apart until we figure things out. Financially, at least. So, _for now_, Daddy's taking the job in Indiana, and Dad's staying here."

"Wait." Quinn interrupted. "So, why are you telling us this?" Rachel sighed again.

"I was given a choice on where I wanted to live. Ft. Wayne Indiana or Lima."

"You're _moving_?" Tina asked incredulously.

Rachel pressed her lips together. "Ft. Wayne has a performing arts school there, called Lincoln. It looks a lot better on an application to Julliard then McKinley does."

Kurt put his head in his hands while Mercedes just looked angry. "So you're just leaving us because all the sudden you got a better offer?"

Rachel's eyes hardened. "Why wouldn't I? It's not like I have much of a reason to stay other than a daily slushy facial and a Glee club that hates me and doesn't even pretend to hide it!" Rachel's voice grew louder and angrier when they watched in horror. "You all treat me horribly and expect me to just lie down, take it, and still save you at the end of the day because I'm talented!"

"Rachel, what are you talking about? Yeah, we treated you horribly before, but we're _friends _now." Santana interjected, looking genuinely upset. Rachel scoffed.

"Which is why you lied to me about Finn, no doubt." Both Finn and Santana's jaws fell open at her words.

Santana began stammering. "How'd you find out about that?" Brittany shuffled guiltily beside her and mumbled, 'Sorry San, I thought she knew.'

Nobody spoke for a long time as Rachel stood at the front of the room fuming, glaring at every member of the club. Artie was the one to break the silence. "But we need you to win. Last time we tried without you we ended up with a drunk April Rhodes and you had to come save us again. We can't do it without you."

Rachel had never known Artie particularly well. They were stronger friends at the beginning when he barely knew Tina and there were less people in the club. Sure they had talked from time to time, and though he never insulted her to her face, she had heard him say little things about her behind her back. And here she was, surprised by his sudden sincerity.

"I'm sorry." She seemed like she was saying it a lot when she shouldn't have to now a days. "But, it's a _Glee club_. Just like Mr. Schue said, it's wonderful, and heartwarming, but twenty years from now, it's not gonna matter. I'm not going to put off my future, my chance of becoming a star, just to help you all win a show choir competition." She almost laughed bitterly as she recalled her famous line. "My dreams are bigger than that." Faces all around the room grow sullen and silent. There was no stopping her.

Rachel drew her shoulders up again. "I'm not angry at you. I am disappointed I have to leave, but… I think it's for the best." No one moved. "Ft. Wayne is only an hour and fifteen minutes away. I can come visit anytime you like. It's not like you're never going to see me again."

Still no one spoke and she wanted to laugh again as she realized that's not what they really cared about. Even back when she first quit, she could still remember, begging for them to take her back in. She had pulled heartfelt line after heartfelt line, about friendship and loyalty, neither getting any response. It wasn't until she had admitted to knowing all the words to the song that they even spoke. Because that didn't care if she could live with herself, or if she felt special being there friend, they just cared that she would still be there, and ready to whip out a quick power ballad and blow them all away. Or at least, that's what she kept telling herself. They wouldn't miss her. They'd just miss her talent.

"Goodbye."

* * *

**A/N: Well, be happy I didn't kill her. Which I am NOT GOING TO DO. But I have officially decided that dramas are fun, but really only a onetime thing, so after this is over I'm going off into cheesy fluffy cute land, with a four or five chapter mutli called 'Thick as Thieves' which is already in the making though I might change the title later. **

** Also, sadly, I am unable to find a spot to shove Puck in next chapter, (as they will be states apart) but I might be able to include a text conversation or something like that. Anyway, sorry, again, but it wasn't as angsty as I was originally planning on making it, I was gonna make her hate all of them, but then I figured that would be kind of ridiculous. So yeah, I'm done with A/N now.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	9. Deja Vu

**PLEASE READ!**

** Alright, I just wanna say something. When deciding where to move Rachel, I just googled a place in Indiana that was close enough to Lima for them to face in Regionals. I didn't actually know that much about it. But today as I was re-watching Journey I heard Sue say that Aural Intensity was from Ft. Wayne, and I literally went, "Holy sh*t! I just put Rachel in Aural Intensity!" So yeah, that wasn't intentional. But I guess it's okay, because I was having trouble coming up with another name anyway. But apparently their school is Westvale High, not Lincoln. Details, details. I like the later. **

** Also, I am EXTREMLEY sorry it took so long to update, but there was this freak storm which caused my power to go out for several days, but I posted this as soon as it came back on.**

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Chapter Nine: Déjà Vu

Everything was different. Instead of McKinley's simple tiling and dull color choices for lockers and walls, everything was intense, almost forceful. The halls looked as if someone had poured paint inside a balloon, and then let it pop. There was splatter paint effect everywhere, in a multi-color explosion. The students however, were exactly the opposite. They were all dressed in different clothes, but they might as well have been wearing the same thing. Rachel could spy at least seven different shades of grey, brown, and tan all down the hall. Maybe it was just her, but she had expected people at a performing arts school to be a little bit more singular, not so lackluster, and analogous. She suddenly felt very out of place in her bright pink sweater and dark purple pleated skirt.

She walked past with ease. Almost everyone parted as she came through, knowing she must be new. She stop in surprise as she saw her name written on a locker door, which she assumed was hers. She examined the locker next to hers a bit more closely, noting a small signature at the bottom. _Paige Kent._ She looked back at her locker, peeling off the sticker that had her name on it before pulling out a sharpie, and writing _Rachel Berry_ in large loopy letters. Then she drew out her gold star from her backpack. It was big and sparkly, like the kind you would she on a dressing room door. She stuck it on the outside, securing it proudly, before stepping back to admire it.

A girl with long, jet black hair watched her curiously. Her shockingly blue eyes blinking with astonishment. After recovering, she strut to the locker beside Rachel, who was putting name to face. This girl was Paige Kent. She wore a short dress, with blue and white plaid design; the same one Rachel had worn to Regionals. Thankful for an ice-breaker, Rachel made a comment on it.

"Oh, cool. I have the same dress." The girl squared her shoulders, and didn't look at Rachel as she responded.

"Well don't wear it here then. Wouldn't want to wear it on the same day now would we? The people here are similar enough already." Rachel wasn't sure what to say. She had barely spoken at all, and it already looked like someone hated her. She just couldn't catch a break. Paige tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear, before turning to Rachel, scrutinizing her. Rachel gave an involuntary shiver as her cold blue eyes traveled her, the reminded Rachel of ice. Paige bit her well moisturized lip, looking as if she was going to say something to her. But instead she slammed her locker shut and walked away without a word.

Rachel let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. A blonde girl across the hall seemed to take pity on her, and strode her way. Rachel gripped the edge of her books nervously as the girl laughed, looping her arm through Rachel's. "I'm Amanda." Rachel just nodded her head. "That was Paige Kent. You're new right?" She took Rachel's silence as a conformation. "Well, I guess it's just bad luck you got stuck next to her."

"So you know her?" Rachel asked tentatively, struggling to keep pace with Amanda, who had surprisingly long legs. Amanda smiled widely.

"Yeah, she's of my best friends." Rachel's eyes widened in confusion. "She's kind of a bitch though," Amanda added, not noticing Rachel. "But she's nicer once you get to know her, deep down she's really a softie. So what's your name?" Rachel wasn't sure if she should run away, or keep walking. This girl seemed a little insane.

"I'm Ra-" She was cut off as Amanda jerked her around the corner speedily, catching Rachel off guard and nearly dislocating her shoulder. Rachel barely had time to register they were in a classroom before Amanda started up again.

"Ray? Your name's Ray?" Amanda asked delightedly. This girl was acting more like Brittany each coming second. Rachel shook her head to correct her. "No, my name's" Amanda cut her off again. "Too bad, I'm calling you Ray." Rachel tried not to groan. She hated that nickname. It reminded her of Rachel Ray, and although Rachel could cook, she never in a million years wanted to own a cooking show.

"Umm..?" There was loud booming laugh that followed this as a boy got out of his seat, looking Rachel up and down. She was suddenly very self-conscious as she struggled to smooth out her skirt. They boy had untidy dirty blonde hair, with very muscular arms. He laughed again at her obvious discomfort.

"I think you're scaring her, Man." Amanda frowned at the unaffectionate nickname.

"Please, so far I'm the only one that's been nice to her. And I told you not to call me Man. It's degrading."

"Why? That's your name. Amanda." He said, grinning wickedly. Only the way he said her name, it sounded more like 'A man, duh'. Wow, this place was harsh. Amanda opened her mouth to retort, when Rachel stopped her.

"Well what's your name?" Rachel asked boldly, hoping to defend her new friend. The boy raised his eyebrows in suspicion before answering.

"Christian." Rachel smiled wickedly.

"Christie, then. Not much better." Amanda giggled as Christian stared at her in astonishment. Rachel shook her pony-tail behind her head in triumph.

"I'm Rachel." She said, sticking her hand out for him to shake. He accepted the offer, his face breaking into a grin.

"Rabies, nice." Amanda rolled her eyes at his poor attempt at a nickname.

"He's Paige's brother." Rachel contemplated what she had just said.

"What?" She asked in disbelief. "You two look nothing alike!" He shrugged.

"Half-brother. Mom slept around a lot." Rachel tried not to look too surprised at his blunt confession, but she could see Amanda shift uncomfortably out of the corner of her eye. Rachel tried to subtly change the subject.

"So, are you in the Glee club?" He smirked.

"Nice." Rachel blushed, she had been called out. "And yeah, I'm the male lead." Rachel nodded her head understandingly.

"Cool. I'm the female lead." Christian and Amanda looked confused.

"They gave you that position already?" Amanda questioned. Rachel shook her head quite seriously.

"No, but I suspect they will soon." Amanda laughed in amazement while Christian just looked amused.

He looked at Amanda. "Is she for real?"

Amanda didn't answer him as she continued to laugh, doubled over. "I think I'm gonna like you." She said, into between breathes, slowly dragging Rachel toward the back of the room. "Come on."

* * *

Rachel sat at the back of the room, swished in between Christian and Amanda. So far, they were the only two friends she had made. Paige was sitting beside Amanda, and they were chatting quietly together, though Paige still refused to even look in Rachel's direction.

Rachel searched the room silently. All the faces seemed vaguely familiar, like she had seen them somewhere before. She leaned over to Christian, who was texting on his phone. "Christy?" His face twisted in annoyance but he turned up anyway. "What's your Glee club's name?" He pressed his lips together, as if trying not to smile.

**(A/N: Now would be a good time to read the first A/N if you are one of those people who still refuse to read even when I put a polite 'please read', but now I'm forcing you, so go read it!) **"_Aural Intensity_." Rachel's jaw dropped. Christian just chuckled. "I know, stupid name right."

Rachel resisted the urge to laugh. "No, it's not that. It's just, we faced you at Regionals. I used to be in New Directions." She explained as Christian slowly started to get it.

"Seriously? I don't remember you." She scoffed in mock offense.

"When you hear me sing, you will." As soon as the words left her mouth a tall, foreign looking man walked into the room, accompanied by a tall red haired woman, who looked sufficiently bored out of her mind.

"Shut up, listen up." He said simply, his voice showing a hint of an accent. All conversations came to a cease, and all heads turned toward him, despite the rather rude demand. The female simply took a seat, and began reading the lasted edition of jazz hands. Rachel's eyebrows raised in scandal. Surely this couldn't be how practice went every day. The man spoke again. "We have a new student, as I'm sure you've noticed. Her name is Rachael Barry." He announced, gesturing her to come to the front of the room. She stood up immediately.

She walked up next to him and he put an arm around her shoulder. "This is Rachael Barry, everyone."

"Rachel Berry," She corrected him under her breath.

"That's what I said." He replied indifferently. "I'd like to introduce you to Madame Muller," He gestured to the red haired woman, who simply nodded on return. "And I am Mr. Horner." He flashed her a blinding smile. "Would you care to sing a song for us Rachael?" She winced at the slight mispronunciation of her name, but nodded anyway. Mr. Horner took a seat next to Madame Muller, leaving Rachel alone on the floor. She glanced at the empty piano bench. Was she expected to play herself? Mr. Horner answered the question for her. "Oh, sorry. Tony!" He called out in the open, and a small, African American man came rushing into the room. "He's always just around." He explained to Rachel, who smiled in remembrance.

"Maybe This Time, B flat." The room murmured once at her song choice, before quieting to hear her sing. Everyone's attention was on her, even Paige's. Rachel licked her lips nervously as the opening chords started playing. She had nothing to worry about.

_Maybe this time, I'll be lucky_

_Maybe this time, he'll stay_

Everyone in the room was in trance. Rachel had to stop herself from grinning too wide, afraid it would affect her singing. She always loved it when someone watched her sing for the first time. She loved the completely blown away look in their eyes. It gave her the confidence to keep going.

_Maybe this time_

_For the first time_

_Love won't hurry away_

She snuck a peek at the directors. Mr. Horner looked as if he had found a diamond while digging in the sand. Even Madame Muller looked somewhat stunned, her book sitting in her lap, rapt attention on Rachel.

_He will hold me fast_

_I'll be home at last_

_Not a loser anymore_

_Like the last time_

_And the time before_

Rachel watched smugly, Amanda's eyes were wide as saucers, while Paige looked impressed. Whereas Christian appeared to be having some sort of epiphany.

_Everybody loves a winner_

_So nobody loved me;_

_'Lady Peaceful,' 'Lady Happy,'_

_That's what I long to be_

_All the odds are in my favor_

_Something's bound to begin_

Rachel took a moment to consider her choice of song, because it was none to less true. Maybe she had judged Lincoln a little too harshly. Maybe things would be better here. Who knows, this really could be her second chance.

_It's got to happen, happen sometime_

_Maybe this time I'll win_

The room sat in a shocked silence as she finished her song. Even Tony the piano player was staring. She shrugged her shoulders, trying not to seem egotistical, and failing miserably. Mr. Horner scratched his chin before rising.

"Well." He stated simply. "I think it's safe to say Miss Barry has blown us all away." He scratched his chin again as the crowd breezed back to life, some clapping. Mr. Horner looked Rachel right in the eye. "I'd like to offer you the position of female lead. Ours just so happens to be…" he trailed off for a moment. "…away." Rachel was doubtful. She was '_away_'. What does that even mean?

"I'd love to be your female lead." She shot Christian a pointed look, who was shaking his head in disbelief. Rachel took her seat, and Madame Muller turned back to her book, looking slightly happier than before. Christian gawked at her openly as Mr. Horner began his musical lecture. He mimicked her earlier movement, leaning in toward her ever so slightly.

"You sang Faithfully with the tall, dopey looking guy." Rachel bit her lip. It seemed every guy she talked to described Finn with those words. Tall and dopey. She just nodded in response, barely moving her head. Christian faced the front of the room again, and Rachel had just recognized their conversation as over when he said, "I don't know how we lost to you."

* * *

"Hey Christy!" Rachel shouted after Christian when Glee practice was over. He turned in response. Rachel jogged to catch up to him. "Do you have a car by any chance? I would ask Amanda, but she was with Paige, oh, wait, you probably ride home Paige, don't you?" She nearly slapped her hand over her mouth when she realized she was rambling.

But Christian was smiling like it was the most adorable thing in the world. "Are you kidding? Paige has her own car, do you need a ride?" Rachel nodded, afraid to open her mouth. They walked in a comfortable silence to the parking lot, where Christian led her up to a black Chevy camaro.

"Umm, wow?" Rachel said in surprise as she fingered the smooth black interior. "Did you pay for this yourself?" He shook his head.

"No, my dad got it for me." She smiled as he opened the door for her in a gentlemanly manner. She thanked he quietly before sliding in, pulling out her phone to check for messages, she forgot to tell her dads she was staying late. Christian started up the car as the phone chimed on, showing no missed calls. She decided to send them a text, just telling her father back in Lima how her dad went, and she was scrolling down her list of contacts when she saw something that made her blood go cold.

Noah.

She had completely forgotten about him. Her fingers glided over the keypad, itching to press dial. She felt this sudden urgent need to call him. Almost as if he had read her mind, her phone lit up with a text from him.

**How was ur 1rst day skool?**

She just stared at the screen. It wasn't long before Christian noticed the quiet and glanced over in her direction. Her eyes were glued to the screen, her mouth set into a tight frown.

"Are you okay?" He took advantage of the red light to see what see was looking at. "Who's Noah? Your boyfriend?" He said the last word with just the slightest hint of malice.

His words woke her up from her trance, and she shook her head before turning her phone off and putting it away. "No, just someone from my old school. No one important." Christian seemed to lighten up at this, and he cheerfully asked for her address before he dropped her off, giving her a one armed hug goodbye.

When she was up in her room, she pulled out her phone just in time to get another text from Noah. She dropped it like it had burned her. That night she left it on the floor.

She didn't even read the text.

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**A/N: Is it awful that I laugh when I read the 'What? NO!" reviews? Yeah, I think it is. My apologies for being evil. **

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	10. The Grass is Always Greener

**Alright here we go. Also, I'd just like to say that for this chapter, feel free to ask me any questions in reviews or PMs, because I have vowed to myself to respond to every review I get. So go for it!**

**Disclaimer: I forgot disclaimer last chapter, so this will have to count for both. I don't own Glee. But Glee spelled backwards is Eelg. And sense I thought of it, I own that. In your face RM!**

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Chapter Ten: The Grass is Always Greener

_Two weeks later…_

It had been fourteen days. Not like anybody was counting. But yeah, fourteen days.

They still hadn't found anyone to replace her. No one at their school wanted to join the glee club, especially now they lost their best singer. Puck was pretty sure Kurt was in denial, because he spent most of Glee mumbling 'Everyone's replaceable' under his breath. Mr. Schue tried his best not to get discouraged by planning harder than ever before. He stayed after school late choreographing and practicing until his energy was drained through and through. Puck almost felt bad for the poor guy, who everyone could tell was just desperately trying not to jump ship. But it's not the kids were making it easy. If Santana had softened even a bit before, the bitch was back full on. She even snapped at Brittany occasionally. Mercedes refused to sing Broadway, Tina was too shy to, and Quinn didn't see what the point was, being the ball of sunshine that she was. Even Finn didn't bother to pretend to pay attention.

He sighed to the quiet room in front of him. "We are a _mess_." Twelve pairs of eye turned toward him. "We probably wouldn't have been so bad off if you all hadn't just stopped trying! At this point _I'm _was the most optimistic one in the club. And that just ain't right." Each of the members had their heads down, as if ashamed of themselves. Damn right they should be. "We can pull it off without Rachel." Santana looked at him skeptically. Mr. Schue stood up from the piano bench he sat in, taking his attention off the ungraded Spanish quizzes.

"Guys, I never thought I'd say this but Puck's right. We need to focus on bouncing back. Okay, I know Rachel quitted threw us off our game, but we pulled off some _great_ numbers without her before." He nodded to himself and the rest of the club sat a little straighter. "Alright, first plan of action. We need another member. Any strings we can pull?" Everyone looked around the room; no one had their hands raised. A dejected look flashed across Mr. Schue's face but then was hidden. "Okay, what about an add?"

"Wouldn't that seem desperate?" Artie asked uncertainly. "Aren't we desperate?" Santana countered sourly. Artie shrugged. "Well, yeah, but what if she sees it? It'll just encourage her."

"What about relatives?" Tina suggested.

Quinn threw out, "Favors or lost bets,"

"Blackmail." Finn said, shrugging. "It worked for me."

A smile stretched across Mr. Schue's face. "Whatever works guys." He glanced at Puck. "Nothing illegal though, Puck. I don't want any threats or beatings." Puck gave him a sarcastic two fingered salute.

"Wait, that reminds me." Kurt interrupted. "Don't we need a new Captain?" Mr. Schue bit his lip and nodded, evaluating the room. None of the kids looked to excited to take the job.

"Why don't we let Puck be Captain?" Puck's eyebrows raised in surprised. "He was the one that snapped us out of our funk." Puck was bemused. "Umm, I really don't think…" Mr. Schue just laughed. "Come on Puck, it's not that bad!"

"Wait wait wait." Finn interjects, shaking his head. "I don't wanna be _his_ co-captain."

"So you were just in it for Rachel," Quinn questions, eyebrows arched. Finn stammered. "No, I-"

"You talk like I've actually accepted the position."

"Haven't you?" Santana deadpanned moodily.

Mr. Schue struggled to gain back the interest of his students. "Guys, guys. Look we can just make Puck captain, and when the next member joins, she can be co-captain."

Mercedes piped up from the back. "And who said it's a she?"

Santana rolled her eyes. "Because, Rachel quit, it's only fair to get a girl replacement. And besides, what straight guy would join Glee anyway?"

Puck scoffed. "Umm, hello? Guitar is kick-ass!" "Agreed!" Artie declared, giving Puck a high-five and a smirk.

Mr. Schue looked as if he was trying to decide what to say first. "Puck, language! And Mercedes, Santana is right." Her look turned dubious as Mr. Schue caught his mistake. "About the first part! It's only fair we get a girl replacement. Of course, boys are welcome to join." Everyone seemed pleased by this arrangement. The smile found its way back to Will's face. "Alright. Shall we discuss music now?"

* * *

Rachel was miserable.

Their glee club was something to be envied. Though New Directions had thought they could easily beat them, they were actually better than they appeared. Each of the students had truly amazing talent. They all just had trouble working together, and didn't really believe they were great. Which was problem that could easily be fixed. Mostly all the students were nice to her, they were friendly and welcoming. She got good solos, and didn't mind all that much when she was mixed in with the rest of the group. She had friends, she had a life. But she was miserable. Because if you asked any girl here what their favorite color was, they'd say pink. Their favorite person? Barbara Streisand. Their dream? To be a huge star. Here at Lincoln, saying you dreamed of being on Broadway was like saying your eyes were brown.

Rachel Berry had never felt so painfully, heartbreakingly _normal_.

"What's the matter Rabies?" Rachel turning her head to face Christian. He was looking at her with a concerned look on his face, game controller still in his hand. Amanda was watching her too, a similar expression. Rachel shrugged lazily.

"I don't know. Just bored I guess." Paige scoffed.

"You're the one who blatantly refused to do anything involving video games. You can go hang out with someone else if you think it'd be more fun." Rachel rolled her eyes. She wasn't sure why she was here. She had just wanted to hang out with Christian, but of course that meant putting up with Paige _and_ Amanda. She liked Amanda, she really did, but that girl acted like she was on sugar high 24/7, and it was just a little hard to deal with.

Amanda threw down her controller. "No, I'm getting bored too." Her face lit up. "Hey, Ray! Why don't we go down to the movie store? We can go to the good one though, it's a little further, but there are better movies there. You can pick whatever you want."

"Sides' Funny Girl." Christian smirked knowingly. Rachel gave them her best showface and nodding, grabbing the keys and leading them out. She probably just needed some air. It started to drizzle slightly as she walked over to her Prius, so she pulled her hood over her head when she started the car, hoping to shield her make-up from harm. Amanda gave her directions as Paige and Christian fought over which was better, Halo or Call of Duty. For someone who seemed so girly on the outside, Paige actually was more the type who could beat anyone at Xbox, though she would never admit to it in public. After about twenty-five minutes of heated discussion, Amanda broke the argument by rolling down the window and shouting, "Halo is for freaks!" out the car window.

"Yeah, I guess I like Call of Duty better too." Rachel said, smirking. Christian looked surprised. "I thought you didn't condone violence." His eyebrows were raised. She shrugged.

"Yeah, I really don't know the difference. I just remember my boyfr- my friend was always ranting about how it was better than Halo, so…" Paige and Amanda exchanged glances.

"Are you ever gonna let us in on your background history? It's so like, cryptic." Amanda rested her head on the back of the seat, arms folded. Paige rolled her eyes. "She just has to make sure we're not creeps before she tells us too much."

"Hey, sense we're all the way out here, why don't we get dinner somewhere? Then we can go back to Christy's." Rachel said out of the blue, trying to change the subject.

"Or we could just crash at your old house?" Rachel bit her lip. "Sure I guess," She replied, shrugging her shoulders. "I'd just need to text my daddy."

"I got it." Amanda cried before anyone else could reply, pulling out Rachel's phone. Her freshly manicured fingers grazed over the buttons, scrolling down her contacts. Her eyes widened. She nudged Christian, then grinned wickedly, showing him all the unfamiliar names. "Hey Ray? Who are all these people?"

"Hmm? Like who?" Rachel asked innocently.

Christian smiled as he grabbed the phone. "Like Artie, Finn, Mercedes, and Santana?" He laughed as he studied them again. "They all have weird names, what's up with that?"

"Okay, you know what, just give it to me, I'll text them." She said defensively, reaching her hand back. Amanda just giggled as Paige watch amused from the front seat.

"No way, I'm gonna call…" She tapped her finger to her lip as Rachel watched her from the mirror in dismay. "Ooo, who's Kurt? Boyfriend?" She asked, waggled her eyebrows. Rachel promptly burst into a fit of laughter. Christian grabbed the phone back.

"I'm gonna call Quinn." Rachel stopped laughing and gasped out loud.

"God no!" Rachel quickly took advantage of the red light by reaching into the back seat and grabbing the phone out of his hands. Her friends snickered at her behavior while she grimaced, putting her phone back into her bag. "Stop distracting the driver." She mock lectured them. When the light turned green she pulled into the shopping center, Christian opening the car door for her.

"Thanks Christy." He tipped his imaginary hat. Paige's jaw dropped as they entered the store.

"This place is _huge_." Her eyes traveled around the brightly lit mega-store. "We're gonna have to split up if we're gonna find anything." She bit her lip for a moment in silence, then quickly recovered, her alpha taking over. "Rachie, Aisles 1-3, Manny 4-7, etc." She took off to eight without another word.

Christian looked amused. "You heard the lady." Rachel nodded, started to the first aisle. She did a quick look around before walk immediately out of what she assumed to be the children's section. She curved into the next aisle. At first she thought she had made a wrong turn. Who would put the horror aisle right next to the children's? She had always hated the horror section; just looking at the covers of the DVDs gave her chills. She quickly bolted down the aisle, and ran smack into to someone who had been standing at the end. "Oh, sorry." She apologized, trying to back away from this person. But the man quickly grabbed onto her shoulders, and she nearly screamed before she looked up.

"Hey Berry." She froze, then lifted her head up slowly. His eyes were a penetrating emerald green, the color they turned only when he was concentrating on something on something. Her jaw went slack with wonder and she could feel her eyes glaze over. What was he doing here? She shook her roughly, trying to bring her back to the present. "Berry!" She could see Amanda running up to them out of the corner of her eye. She felt her tiny hands pull her away.

"Who the hell are you?" She exclaimer angrily. Paige and Christian came out of nowhere as Amanda continued to hold Rachel possessively. Puck looked somewhere between surprised and confused.

"Whoever you are, I can guarantee you I've known Berry longer than you have." This was met by silence as all eyes turned to Rachel, who rolled her shoulders back and let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding.

"N-Puck," She quickly corrected herself from saying his name, and he raised her eyebrows at her. "This is Amanda," She introduced. He glanced briefly at her before looking at Rachel again. "And Paige," Paige crossed her arms over her chest a smiled sultrily. Amanda stifled a giggle. "And Christian." Puck didn't stick his hand out, and neither did Christian, they both sort of just stared at each other menacingly. "Puck can I talk to you?" She asked, grabbing his arm and pulling him away without waiting for an answer.

"So," He said, once they were far enough away. "How's Lincoln?" She could tell from the look on his face that he was upset she didn't text him back, but was too afraid of sounding like a teenage girl to say it out loud. She pressed her lips together.

"Guess what? They do have a glee club. It's Aural Intensity. I had no idea." His eyes widened for a moment before he let out a deep throaty chuckle, which turned into a cackle like sound as he began to laugh harder. She fought back a small grin. "How's New Directions?" She asked hesitantly. His laughted stopped immediately as he tried to put a serious look back on his face.

"Umm, we're good." He ran his hand over his shaved head. "We haven't found anyone to replace you yet though." He sneaked a peek at her, just as she began to nod understandingly. "Umm, so if you're in Aural Intensity," He snickered again. "Doesn't that mean you'll be facing us at Regionals?" Rachel froze for a moment as her mind tossed it over.

She blinked several times before answering. "Oh, yeah. I guess." She tried to figure out what to do with her hands, finally folding them across her stomach. It looked like Puck was about to say something when he was cut off by Amanda.

"Ray? We picked out a movie. We want to leave!" She said bluntly. Rachel yelled, 'Coming,' before turning to Puck one last time. "Well, I'll see you later, Puck." He didn't say anything back, but as she turned she could have sworn she saw him wince at his nickname. She jogged causally up to her friends. "What movie did you guys pick?"

"Fame." Paige replied gleefully as Christian mimed gagging behind her. Somehow she caught him, and slapped him on the arm. "It's a good movie!" He faked a smile, which earned him a scowl. "Come on; let's get out of here already." Rachel nodded and started out before Paige threw a hand in front of her. "Don't think this means you get off telling us who that guy was." She tossed Rachel a wicked smirk before walking out the door.

* * *

"Alright." Mr. Schue said, clapping his hands together. "Any progress? Did you guys find anybody?" Everyone in the room was silent. Mr. Schue's face dropped. "Come on guys, I thought we had a plan!"

Finn shrugged. "Sorry Mr. Schue, I don't really have anything I could blackmail somebody with." The rest murmured similar excuses, from dead cousins to dislike of showtunes.

"Guys." Mr. Schue said seriously. "We _need_ to get more members. Otherwise we're disqualified." He shook his head at them. "Isn't there anything you can give me?" Puck hesitated for a second, before speaking up.

"I saw Rachel yesterday." He confessed. Mr. Schue's mouth dropped.

"Where?" Kurt asked on impulse.

"I saw her at the movie store with a bunch of these random people. Two girls and a guy, I think." He nearly laughed at the shocked expressions on their faces. "Oh, and get this. You know how she picked that performing arts school? Well they have a Glee club there too, but it's _Aural Intensity_." No one seemed as humored by this as he was.

Quinn put her head in her hand. "That means we're competing against her. Great." She sighed.

Santana's eyes widened and an excited look stretched across her face. "Wait!" Her head whipped around to face Puck. "Why don't you just get her to come back?" Confusion flashed across Puck's face. "Just talk to her, persuade her, if anyone can do it you can. I mean, she won't listen to Finn or me, or anyone else for that matter."

"Yeah!" Mr. Schue said encouragingly. "You can just use that run in as in excuse to talk to her and get her to come back before we have to compete!"

"Wait wait wait. What makes you think I'm gonna agree to this? I'm already your Captain, and now you're recruiting me to manipulate Rachel? What else do you want me to do?" Mercedes rolled her eyes.

"Boy, it's just making up for all the other time you slacked off. You gotta be a team played at some point. Anyway, sense when do you care about hurting Rachel's feelings?" Puck's mouth hung open, unsure how to answer.

"Fine, whatever. I'll do it." Santana eyed him curiously as she leaned back in his chair angrily. Truth was, he had no idea how to get Rachel to come back to New Directions. At the movie store, she actually seemed kind of happy, with friends and everything. Why would she wanna come back? And why did anyone think Puck could get her to. Their only conversation in about two weeks was short and awkward. And, he thought as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat, she still hadn't answered his texts.

* * *

**Heh heh heh. Puck has a mission. Next chapter is bound to be long, juicy, and engorged with venom, and drama. Sorry I'm not updated as often, but I'm getting further into my plot and it's getting harder and harder to write, but the next one I'm actually really excited about, so we'll see.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	11. People Never Learn

**Gah! I know, I know, I deserve to die a slow and painful death because it has been forever! I've just been a little bit preoccupied with other things, like Ned Flanders hot chocolate, and girl scout cookies. (I just found a box I must have bought AGES ago, thank god they're not stale)**

**Also, I deleted three of my less popular stories in order to save space, so Green Eyes, When the Time is Right, and The Grass is Always Greener have been deleted. Sorry to anyone who liked those.**

**Disclaimer: I'm feeling dumb today, so I'll just say, no, I **_**don't**_** own Glee. Or Chicago.**

* * *

Chapter Eleven: People Never Learn

_One week later…_

"So nobody can figure out what to do without you gone, and Santana just keeps bitching everybody out, and yesterday she was yelling at Tina for being too shy to take all the solos, and Tina just like, _snapped_. Artie actually had to break it up, it was kind of hilarious." Rachel gave an appreciative laugh, swinging her legs over the side of the couch.

Shortly after their brief encounter at the movie store, Puck starting calling more often than normal. Eventually, Rachel decided it would save her minutes and messages to just pick up, which led to them talking and hanging out more than usual. Rachel was a bit surprised at the sudden interest, but it was nice to be with someone who wasn't almost exactly like her. With her and Puck, it was like a mash-up, they didn't seem like they'd go together, but that's what made them great. She hadn't told any of her new friends about him yet. She wasn't sure how they would react. None of them seemed to be too comfortable when she mentioned his name, though Paige thought he was hot. Amanda, begrudgingly, told Rachel she thought so too.

Puck smiled at her, and casually tossed his arm around her, not taking his eyes off the show they were watching. She raised her eyebrows at him. "Smooth." She said coolly, without removing his arm. This happened a lot, moment of sexually tension, or a small romantic gesture would take place. Rachel wasn't sure what to make of it, and often times she had to ask herself what she would do if he did make a move.

She looked up at him through her eyelashes, biting her lip to keep herself from smiling. He looked in her directions and grinned slightly, and suddenly he was a bit closer to her face than she realized.

Her phone rang from the coffee table, causing Rachel o nearly jump in surprise, and Puck's head was back to the TV again. She sighed before picking it up, trying to clear her head. Of course it would be Christian that would interrupt and moment like that. She let it go to voicemail, leaning back again; sad that Noah's arm was gone. He turned to her for a second. "Who's Christian?"

The question caught her off guard. "Oh, umm, you met him? Remember at the movie store?" He nodded.

"Is he your boyfriend?" He asked, with a pained expression on his face. She laughed.

"No, he's just a friend, and I'm pretty sure my other friend Amanda is into him." He nodded, looking somewhat relieved, before putting his arm around her again.

* * *

Puck walked into the choir room, ten minutes early, and was welcomed by the sight of Mercedes, Kurt, Tina, and Artie standing (well, sitting, in Artie's case) in a line, like they were waiting for him to come. "We need to talk, white boy." Mercedes said in a threatening manner. Puck was badass, he wasn't afraid of anything, but right now, he was a little scared. So he sat right down.

Kurt looked right at him. "You need to hurry up. Sectionals is coming _soon_. Okay, we can't win with only eleven people, we can't even compete!"

Puck scoffed. "No shit, Sherlock. I'm trying okay, but Berry…" He trailed off as they all looked at him suspiciously. "It takes _time_, okay?"

"Yeah, well we don't have time. You just need to try harder." Artie said huffily, his arms crossed.

"Yeah, what's your great plan?" Mercedes and Kurt exchanged looks, which made Puck think that they actually _did_ have a plan.

"You're mom and sister are out of town, right?" Kurt asked slowly. Puck didn't answer, wondering why the hell he knew that. Kurt glanced at Mercedes again. "Why don't you go over the Ft. Wayne? Just for a day or two? You'd have more of an advantage if you just had more time, as you asked for." Puck was silent for a moment, trying to work it out in his head. Could he really just seal the deal in a day? He shook his head.

"I don't think Mr. Schue would go for it."

* * *

He went for it.

"Come on, Puck!" Quinn encouraged him. "If anyone can do it, it's you." He crossed his arms sullenly, pouting. Quinn continued like she hadn't noticed. "I already texted Rachel from your phone, she knows you're coming." Puck stared at her dubiously. They weren't dating! She couldn't just go on his phone and text people. Quinn paused, once again ignoring Puck's unspoken complaints. "She seemed excited." She said, her voice guarded and light, though her eyes were boring into his.

It was his turn to ignore her. "Fine, make sure I don't miss anything big." He continued shove things from his locker into his backpack. At this point he was just grabbing anything his hands touched, it's not like he knew his homework anyway. Quinn noticed his fake preoccupation, and happily slammed his door shut.

"Sense subtly obviously doesn't work for you," Each word rang sharp, and he would be scared if he didn't know that that was just normal Quinn, every sentence dripped with sarcasm. "I'm just gonna come straight out and say it. Do you like her or not?" He was surprised by the sudden turn of conversation.

He suddenly became very interested in the zipper of his book bag. "I don't know what you're talking about." He said, his voice coming out rough. He snuck a peek up at Quinn. She looked somewhere between annoyed and bemused.

Her mouth started opening and closing like a fish out of water, and just as he was about to start worrying she laughed. "Oh my god." She cried in between breathes, her laughter calm and somewhat sinister. "I know that voice Puck, I should. That's your 'complete bullshit' voice." Puck didn't know he was supposed to respond. Was he really that easy to read? Quinn shook her head slowly, staring at him. She gave a short breathy laugh again. "You've got to be kidding." She sighed. "I'm not mad, confused and jealous, maybe." His eye widened at the latter. "Mostly confused." She backtracked. "Why do you even like her?"

He shrugged as he thought about it. He wasn't really sure why either. But when she wasn't giving an insanely long speech or talking about show tunes, she was actually kind of fun to be around. And sure, she kind of drives him crazy, but even when she does, he doesn't really mind. He opened his mouth to say so, when it actually seemed to hit him what she was actually about to say. He wasn't a chick! He wasn't about to blab to Quinn about how he 'like-liked' Rachel. So instead he just said, "I never admitted to anything." Quinn gave him a look of disappointment, before tapping him on the shoulder and walking off, leaving Puck even angrier than before.

* * *

Everyone in the room grew silent as Mr. Schue entered, a huge smiled plastered on his face. "Alright guys, good news." The room stirred, interested. Mr. Schue glanced around briefly. "Has Puck left already?" He asked.

Quinn nodded. "Yeah, why?"

Mr. Schue continued smiling. "Because I think we might have sent him over there for no reason." People looked confused. "I found another member." He admitted, his voice brimming with excitement. Shouts exploded all over the room.

"What, who?" Kurt demanded, his voice going several octaves higher.

"Boy or girl?" Santana shot out. Mr. Schue waved his hands, trying to get everyone to calm down. He pointed his hands to the door. "My I introduce you all to Alicia Walker." A tall, tan girl walked through the door. Her teeth were sparkly white, and she had long, black, glimmering hair.

She stopped at the center of the room. "Hi, I'm Alicia." Her voice was soft and controlled. Mercedes gave Quinn and impressed look. The boys shuffled slightly, eyeing over the Spanish beauty. Mr. Schue clapped his hands together and he gave his students to thumbs up.

"Alright, Alicia, would you like to sing for us?" Alicia, nodded, smilingly warmly. She turned to Brad, who was sitting at the piano, staring at her in surprise.

"Roxie, Chicago, please." She grinned again, facing the room head on.

_The name on everybody's lips is gonna be: Roxie__  
__The lady raking in the chips is gonna be: Roxie_

Mr. Schue smiled somewhat evilly as the rest of the room gaped at the as the girl continued to sing with a smug look on her face. She was almost as good as Rachel. _Almost._

_I'm gonna be a celebrity,__  
__That means somebody everyone knows,__  
__They're gonna recognize my eyes, my hair, my teeth, my boobs, my nose.__  
_  
_From just some dumb mechanics wife, I'm gonna be: Roxie__  
__Who says that murder's not an art?__  
__And who incase she doesn't hang,__  
__Can say she started with a bang?__  
__Roxie Hart!_

But almost was good enough.

* * *

**Sorry for the shortness. I was planning on it being longer, but I cut it in half in fear of it being too dramafied. My goal is at least three reviews! That way I'll be able to pass my other story, Unexpected, in review numbers! Yay!**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	12. No Repeats, or Hesitation

**Wow. I think I've finally recognized that I am the epitome of procrastination. Sorry for the long wait. I have this horrible disease which only lets me write when I'm inspired. And being sick for five days straight, not very inspiring. Is it just me, or do I get sick a lot? Sick and distracted, I blame Tumblr. **

**Anyway, SIL is trying a different writing style today. And I heard some request for more Pezberry friendship, so I added in a little chocolate chip of that to my Showface cookie. I also put the title in my story. Am I the only one who thinks of Family Guy when people do that? (He said it! He said it!) Maybe I'm just weird. **** That wouldn't surprise me. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned Glee I wouldn't make you wait twenty-five more days just to see it.**

* * *

Chapter Twelve: No repeats, or hesitation. 

_The Next Day…_

Rachel was speechless. Twelve hours ago, she opened her door to find Noah Puckerman standing on the stoop, overnight bag in hand. Sure, she had gotten his text earlier that day, but she hadn't been all that sure if it was real, or if she was just hallucinating. She showed him the guest bedroom where he would be staying, then offered him a drink as you talked in the living room. She can't really remember what happened after that.

She woke up at five in the morning, still fully clothed, with a messed up hair and a horrible hangover. That's when it came flooding back.

She shot up from the couch. "Oh!" A large blanket moved beside her as she shook Puck awake. When his eyes finally opened him, she stared at him wordlessly with raised eyebrows. He only smirked, brushing her hand off, and straightened himself up. "You found my dad's tequila stock? They're gonna notice that's gone." She said sternly.

"I'll get it replaced before I leave." He assured her, standing up and entering the kitchen. Rachel remained seated for a moment, looking at the door. She wondered why he always just left, and then expected her to follow. Was it obvious she would? Then the smell of dough wafted through the room, sending Rachel rocketing into the kitchen. She came upon a rather amusing sight, Noah Puckerman, standing at the counter, stirring waffle batter. Rachel smiled as his obvious concentration.

"Waffles?" She asked delightedly, skipping in. He turned in her direction and grinned.

"They're great hangover food." She watched as he continued to stir the batter by hand, and poured it into the waffle machine.

"I guess I just didn't know you could cook." Rachel said, sounding surprise. He shrugged, not offering an explanation as he sat down. Rachel bit her lip, hesitating for a moment, before asking the question she really wanted to ask. "So…" She started smoothly, trying not to be obvious. "Did we…?"

He laughed at her obvious discomfort as she blanched across the table. "No, we just had fun." He caught the look on her face. "That's not an innuendo." She nodded slowly as Puck took a sip of his water. "Trust me Berry, even when you're drunk…" He trailed off, not sure how to end that sentence. She just assumed he was implying that even under a state off heavy intoxication, she would never just jump into bed with someone. She smiled at him. "You did mention New Directions though." He said, abruptly changing not only the conversation, but Rachel's mood. She leaned back away from him unconsciously, averting her eyes, afraid of what she might have said.

She collected her thoughts as he continued to blatantly observe her. She stuck her chin in the air defiantly before responding. "Well, whatever I said, I'm sure it's not true." His eyes darkened slightly and he was opening his mouth when the waffle timer went off. She heard him emit a soft growling before raising, returning with two golden brown waffles and a container off syrup. She carefully forked the smaller of the two onto her plate, before grabbing the syrup quickly, not wanting any awkward handing touching.

They ate in silence, neither really looking at each other, not knowing what to say. As she was taking a small sip of orange juice, Puck seized the opportunity by saying, "You could come back." Rachel froze, swallowing the liquid thickly before setting the glass down and facing Puck, both hands on the table.

"No, Noah. I couldn't. I have friends here. Commitments. I can't just turn and run back" Rachel winced at the harsh look on his face.

"Yeah, well you had friends back in Lima. You had commitments, you just left anyway."

"_Real friends,_" She replied scathingly. "Ones that I don't have to beg to friends with or ones that don't go behind my back."

"One friend did that Rachel. One. What about Kurt?" He asked scornfully before narrowing his eyes. "What about me?" Rachel was suddenly very interested in her waffles, and didn't answer. Puck scoffed. "I don't know why you're so mad at Santana anyway. Think about it, she sleeps with everyone, it's not like it's a personal thing."

Rachel sighed as Puck's brow scrunched in confusion. "Let's just… not talk about this now, okay?" She said, trying to keep her tone light. "You're here for the day; we might as well enjoy each other's company before you have to go." Puck nodded, and just like that, they both continued eating their waffles like the conversation had never happened.

* * *

"So," Santana started drawlingly. The girl blinked up at her with the largest, most innocent doe eyes she's ever seen. The expression on her face was so sweet it made Santana want to puke. "Where did you say you transferred from?" Santana was suspicious of this girl, and how she just happened to skip in and save the day. She had that blinding white smile that looked more like a show face, and from what she learned from St. Douche was that you could never trust someone like that. But still, the girl hung around Santana's side, surprisingly clingy for someone who projected so much confidence. It was like Alicia thought that sense they were both Latinas they were automatically best friends. Santana wasn't buying it.

"Wadleigh," She answered, a little quickly. Her smile went wider, if that was possible. "It's in New York." Santana threw back her shoulders menacingly.

"Funny." She replied shortly. "Never heard of it."

"Well it's not a very good school." She replied laughing, tossing her hair. Santana's eyes narrowed and she turned her seat to face her directly.

"I'm sure you noticed I not the one to hide my dislike, so I'm just gonna say it. I don't trust you, and I sure as hell don't like you." She had expected Alicia's eyes to widen in shock, but instead she just smirked, crossing her arms over her chest, raising her eyebrows mockingly. Santana continued before she could say anything. "You might think you can just come in here and save the day, but you're lucky if you're half the singer Rachel was. Because the girl you're _replacing_ had a voice that deaf kids could appreciate, where as yours will probably never be heard anywhere outside of a strip club."

Alicia looked highly amused. "If she was so good then, why'd she leave?"

"That's none of your business." Santana snapped back. "All I know is that if you think you're as good as Rachel Berry, you're sadly mistaken." With that, she stood up and called for Brittany. And as she walked out to door, she couldn't help but feel like her diva storm out was tribute to Rachel.

* * *

Kurt wasn't that sure about Alicia. For the most part she seemed like a genuinely nice person. But that was the thing. A lot of times when people are completely innocent, no suspicion whatsoever, it usually means there is something to be suspicious about. If that made any sense.

So Kurt took up spy work. He watched her turn corners, he observed every time she talked to someone, and became very interested in Cosmo. (Good for peeking over the corner, but gives the illusion of being preoccupied) But the more he watched, the more she reminded him of Rachel. She studied _all the time_, and when she wasn't doing well in class, she was singing. She talked to anyone who would listen, and she always had that ridiculous grin Rachel would wear when she was hiding something.

He did admire her taste in fashion though. She rarely wore hardcore designers like McQueen, but she had quite a bit of Abercrombie-_not important_. But for someone so outwardly social, he noticed that she and Santana had a bit of a rough spot. They would send glares at each other from across the room, and _accidently _bump into each other in the halls. He was almost afraid to ask why.

But there were a few surprising things about her. Like that fact that she seemed biologically connected to her phone. And sense it was Kurt saying that, you know it's true. It's like Finn calling you an idiot.

That's how you know it's bad.

* * *

"I'm saving up my money to buy the second one when it comes out," Puck explained to Rachel between bites of pizza. Rachel listened, peeling off the pepperoni as he rambled about Super Mario something or other. She watched amusedly as he stuffed piece after piece in his mouth, as he was talking, so she really couldn't understand the words even if she knew what he was talking about. She had never played video games in her life, her daddies said it 'destroyed your imagination' and wasted valuable practice time.

Her phone vibrated with a text messages, she just smiled as Puck continued, reaching for her phone. '**Wat r u doing?'** She bit her lip, hesitant to tell him. She carefully pressed her lips together and typed **'Hanging w/ my dads' **before sending the message guiltily. Puck just then seemed to notice he wasn't paying attention to her. "Who was that?" Rachel didn't have the chance to answer before Christian sent her another text. **'Tell em I said hi'** She smiled unconsciously, not noticing when Puck leaned over to look. "That Christian guy?" She snapped her phone shut as he leaned back, looking highly uncomfortable. "Are you like dating him now?" He asked his face scrunched up in pain.

"No. We're just friends." He sent her a weird look, and from some reason she could clearly hear him saying 'You sure?' like they were having some sort of telepathic communication. She gave one short nod. Puck picked up his pizza and looked like he was about to take a bite, then set it down again, looking deep in thought. After a moment of comfortable silence, he finally turned to her.

"Do you really like it here?" It wasn't the question she was expected to hear. But he said it a tone so calm, so un-Puck-like, it made her want to answer truthfully. She too set down her pizza.

"Yes. I do." She said, bringing her hands to her lap. "There are some things I don't like about it, but nothing's perfect." Puck rolled his eyes at the cliché line.

"Then why didn't you go here sooner?" He asked sarcastically.

"I didn't have the option to." Rachel shot back, trying not to get angry.

He fired his next question without missing a beat, and it threw Rachel off guard. "Do you miss McKinley at all?" She felt her face fall as she looked away, unsure how to answer. Truthfully, she did. A _little_. Just a miniscule amount. She's not even that sure why, she got slushied, made fun of, people sought out to torture her, she was plainly and drastically unpopular. But she was special. In a way people didn't necessarily like, but in a way they couldn't ignore. Sometimes, (though it was one of her secrets) she still bought herself slushies. She didn't throw them at herself, of course, she didn't miss slushy facials, but she missed the taste.

She struggled to look indifferent. "A bit." He nodded. "But," She continued, then stopped because she wasn't really sure what she was going to say, she just wanted to stop him from saying what came next.

"Come back." He said plainly, and immediately it was like he had broken some unspoken rule, and Rachel recoiled.

"No." She returned in the exact same voice. Then suddenly he was too close to her, and she could barely hear him whisper 'Please?' so softly it was almost a hiss. She was fighting to remain in a normal breathing pattern as something flickered in her mind. She thought of the time Finn seduced her into coming back to Glee. She wouldn't let herself fall for it again. Summoning all the strength she had, she brought her hands up and promptly pushed him away. "No." She repeated, firmly this time. Puck frowned in defeat as Rachel checked her phone again and sighed. "I think it's time for you to go, Noah."

He nodded silently, waving slightly before he grabbed his unopened bag and walked out the door an hour before he was originally supposed to leave. Rachel didn't wave back, focused her eyes on the blank screen in front of her, trying not to feel disappointed he left so quickly.

* * *

Puck wasn't upset. He_ wasn't_. He just felt bad that he broke his promise to the club, and failed to get Rachel back to Glee. That didn't stop him from clutching the wheel even tighter as he speeded his way back to Lima, trying to focus on nothing but the road, which led him to drive more careful than ever before.

He didn't even bother stopping at his house, he just went right over to McKinley, knowing they'd be practicing for Glee around this time. He after searching around for a parking spot for a minute or two, he decidedly threw it into park in a handicap space, not really caring. He found the choir room empty, so he headed to the only other place they'd be, the auditorium. As he started getting closer, he was surprised to hear the opening notes to Don't Stop Believing playing. He was expected to hear Quinn's voice for the female lead, but was instead greeted by a new voice. Her singing sounded effortless, and he would have been nothing short of amazed had he not heard better. He turned to corner and evaluated the scene in front of him.

A tall, tan, Latina girl was standing just a few feet away from Finn, grinning obnoxiously. Before he could get a good look however, the music stopped playing, and he heard Mr. Schue shout, "Puck!" Puck gave the girl a good one over, than jogged up to the side of the stage. "Sorry Mr. Schue, I couldn't get her to come back." He explained, but Mr. Schue didn't look sorry at all.

He clapped his hand on Puck's back, turning him to face the girl, who was now blatantly checking him out. "That's okay Puck. We have a new female lead, Alicia Walker." The girl, Alicia, smirked at the mention of her name, and Puck nearly grimaced, realizing it was actually a very unattractive trait on almost every except him. Though he had to admit, the girl was hot. He shook these thoughts away as Mr. Schue continued. "We won't need you to get Rachel back anymore. Alicia's got us covered." The rest of the club smiled happily at this, while Kurt, Quinn, Santana, and Finn all looked somewhat unsure. "Actually," Mr. Schue said after a brief pause. "Sense you're the captain, why don't you try taking the lead this time? You pulled it off at Regionals." Before Puck could really answer, he was thrust up on the stage with Alicia smiling at him creepily and the beginning notes starting to play.

* * *

She was trying to convince herself that she wasn't _technically _doing anything wrong. Or permanent. But minutes after Puck left, she realized that maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she came down to check. Or just visit. It was just a visit after all, to check up on her old friends, see how everyone was doing. Or at least, that's what she was trying to convince herself.

But a small part of her thought maybe it wouldn't be so bad to go back. Like actually transfer back. Slushies were manageable, and she could still talk to Christian and Amanda, even Paige. It wasn't like she was leaving them behind. She just… she missed being a part of something special, and she was starting to realize that New Directions was really the only Glee club that actually believed in that, and not just winning. She missed that.

She saw Puck's car in the parking lot, silently her head when she saw he was parked in a handicap zone. She quietly shut her door, almost as if she was afraid someone would hear her. She looked both ways quickly before sneaking into the school, not sure if she'd get kicked out or not, she wasn't a student here anymore. But the halls were empty, and she found herself sprinting toward the choir room, only stopping when she heard voices, and pressed herself up against the wall.

Before she could determine whose voices they were, they were replaced by music, a song that she easily recognized. She let it guide her to the auditorium, which she was right outside of when she heard it.

_Just a small town girl,_

But it wasn't Finn's voice singing the song anymore, it was Puck. So found herself subconsciously smiling as she walked through the door, catching Puck's eye as he belted out the rest. He smiled at her, but as the music continued a look of panic flashed over his face. Then Rachel noticed a girl she had originally mistaken for Santana standing beside him, a girl she hadn't seen before.

_Just a city boy,_

_Born and raised in south Detroit,_

_He took the midnight train going anywhere,_

Then it hit her. They had gotten a new female lead. One that Puck hadn't told her about. She stood shock still for a moment as the song continued, then turned around, and walked straight back.

* * *

**It seems like all my PuckelBerry stories involve either pancakes or waffles. But they're just so much fun to make! Also Woodleigh is a real, so if you read this and happen to go there, don't be angry. I'm sure it's an awesome school. :D I like smiley faces, they make everything happy. ALSO! Virtual cookies to anyone who knows where the chapter title is from! **


	13. It Takes Two to Tango

Oh god, I wanna kill myself for letting this happen again with yet another one of my stories. Who knew life would get in the way of fanfic? And gosh, I was supposed to get this done before Glee came back, but it's a little late for that. Hope this makes the wait for Rocky Horror go a bit faster… and my apologies for suckiness.

Disclaimer: If my name was spelled R-y-a-n_M-u-r-p-h-y, I might own glee, but unfortunately it's spelled *x-o-x-o-S-i-l-v-e-r-y-I-n-k-L-e-t-t-e-r-i-n-g-x-o-x-o-*, which, I guess is pretty cool too.

* * *

Showface Chapter Thirteen: It Takes two to Tango

_One week later…_

Rachel put the thin red tip of her swizzle stick in her mouth, chewing absentmindedly as she flipped channel through channel. Today was probably the only day they decided to pay tribute to Journey on the Today Show, and then talk about the important of small town art programs on Good Morning America. It was also probably the only day of her life when re-watching Funny Girl _did not_ make her feel better. In fact, it just made her even more depressed. Barbara Streisand never had to deal with being replaced, she was Barbara Streisand! And even when things didn't go her way, even when she got sad she still managed to pull herself together and put on a heartbreakingly beautiful performance of People in front of a no doubt sold out crowd of adoring fans. The least Rachel could do was sing it in front of a room full of people that were partially the reason she was so upset.

Her phone vibrated beside her, and for a second she considered not even answering it. But by the seventh time it buzzed she gave in as she snatched the phone up. "Hello?"

"…hey." Paige said distractedly. "Emergency club meeting, can you be here in ten?"

"I can be there in five." Rachel responded confidently. She was used to short, awkward phone conversations with Paige, they mostly always revolved around another people, and barely lasted over thirty seconds.

"Good." There was a long pause, and right as Rachel reached for the end button Paige spoke again. "…Um… there's something we kind of need to tell you." Rachel could hear Amanda's muffled voice in the background. "You know what, we'll tell you when you get here." Rachel nodded, forgetting Paige couldn't see her through the phone.

"Oka-" But Paige had already hung up. Rachel stared at the phone in disbelief. The phone call had been more than a little cryptic, even for Paige. Rachel was always the one to hate secrets, and most surprises, she didn't trust other people to plan things right, so was in a rush to find out what it was they needed to tell her. Not wanting to waste time, she grabbed her jacket and keys and jogged out the door.

As she revved the engine, her phone vibrated with another call. She glanced at it briefly, before dismissing it. Puck had been calling her on and off for days, leaving messages from time to time, texting her others. If Rachel didn't constantly remind herself she was angry with him, she would have laughed at his obvious frustration.

'_Jesus, Rach. Umm.. it's not what it looks like. Fuck, I sound like a chick. Just.. umm, I can… explain. So, just call me...Damn it!'_

_ 'Seriously! It's not that big of a fucking deal! She's like not even that good anyway, she's like this weird Latina brat that Santana absolutely can't stand… seriously, they like always get in fights, and it's kinda hot- but no, umm… She's like pathetic. And she's always flirting with me and… okay, you know what. Bye.'_

_ "Okay, if you don't answer my next call, I will drive to your house, throw your ass in the back of my truck and take you back to Lima no matter how many SAT vocab words and treats of legal accusation you throw at me, cuz I don't even give a damn any more, answer your fucking phone!'_

_ 'Fine. I know where you live. And I'm going to go there. And I don't even care how stalkerish that sounds. See you soon, Rachie.'_

Rachel sighed and pulled into Lincolns parking lot, noticing a shiny new car parked in the students spot. Not many of the kids owned cars here, they preferred to ride to ever musical bus and sing songs with their friends simply because it was more fun, so she noticed when there was a new person. So wondered if that's what they were going to tell her, that they had a new member? That's not what it sounded like.

Rachel let herself into the choir room around the back entrance with a key they had given to all the club members, she opened it to find the club scattered around the room, all facing the direction of the girl in the center. A tall, black haired, grey eyed girl with blindingly white teeth stood with her hands on her hips, eyeing Rachel cockily.

Wait a minute…

Rachel knew this girl! She was the one she had seen on the stage singing with Puck and the rest of New Directions! This was the girl who had replaced her, the girl who had made her depressed and potentially ruined all chances of her ever going back to McKinley!

Madame Muller pulled her lips back, revealing her teeth in a tight, almost strained smile. "Rachel, may I introduce you to, Alicia Walker." She pronounced each syllable declaredly, until it sounded like Uh-leesh-uh Wa-ker. "She is our female lead. She has come back from her exchange!"

Alicia stuck her hand out to a shock still Rachel and grinned wider than ever. "Enchanté."

* * *

"Shit." Rachel murmured under her breath as she pulled down her street. There was a red truck in her driveway, so she was assuming Puck had pulled through on his threat. But she didn't have time to deal with him right now, she was going through a personal crisis, he could wait.

She wasn't going to lie. She had spied on Vocal Adrenaline, and, _occasionally_, took their ideas, but this was another level. One she wasn't so sure she was comfortable with. She had been on the receiving end. Even if nobody else believed Jesse was actually on their side, she did. And then she found he wasn't, and he was just lying to whole time. About everything. And she was the only one who got hurt, because she was the only one who really believed it but know, everyone was fooled. Even Mr. Schuester. And Puck had said she had been flirting with him… did that mean Puck was the next her? As weird as that sounded, she thought that maybe he was. But Puck wasn't going to fall for her, was he? Surely he was smarter than that, then again, so was Rachel.

But she couldn't say anything. Of course she couldn't. She almost wondered if it was cleverly devised test. A test to see whether or not Rachel was still loyal to New Directions. She wasn't, of course, but who could blame her for having a moral conscience? She wasn't solace for crying out loud!

She wasn't upset with them. Really, she wasn't. She had expected as much from Paige, and Amanda, who just seemed to follow her lead. They all seemed like what she used to be. Determined, and ready to do anything to win. And Rachel does want to win, just… not like this. But she had to know one thing, it was the only thing she really cared about at the moment.

She shifted into park and whipped out her cell phone. The phone rang ten times as she tapped her foot impatiently but before she could hang up and try again she heard Christian's tired sounding voice on the other end. "Hello?"

"Chirsty!" She nearly shouted with joy. Suddenly, a hand shot through the open window and slammed her phone shut. She turned over cautiously to see a very pissed off looking Puck, who was glaring at her expectantly.

Opps.

His face relaxed as she stared at him with wide eyes. "Calling you boyfriend?"

"..boyfriend." Rachel growled. His hands dropped his side and she realized that he looked very, very _tired_. Her heart gave a pitiful little pang. She almost hit herself in the chest in a desperate attempt to make it stop. He ran his hand over his shaved head.

"Look… I'm…" She felt horrible. She wanted to sit her and listen to him explain and make everything better, especially after he had come all this way… but she couldn't. She had to find Chritstian.

"I'm sorry." She said sincerely, starting the engine and shooting down the street, going way over the speed limit. She could hear his angry shout from behind and the rumble of her truck engine. She raced her way over the main street of the town, turning off the ignition as she was jumping out. Christian!" Rachel practically screeched as she sprinted into the Fort Wayne branch of Breadsticks. Christian nearly dropped the platter he was carrying in surprise. Rachel skidded to a halt in front of him as he hurriedly put down the order and dragged Rachel to the side hall.

"Rachel, how many times have I told you not to come here while I'm working, I nearly got fired last time-" She cut him off, struggling to speak but also trying to catch her breath.

"Did you know she was a spy?" She watched his eyes widen, but he didn't look confused at all, which she decides is better; at least he wouldn't try to deny that he knew. But it still hurt, knowing he knew about this the whole time and didn't tell her.

"You mean Alicia?" Her eyes narrowing in disgust as she turned away, only to have Christian grab her arm and wheel her back around. "I'm sorry." He said simply. "I, I wanted to tell you, but the others were so sure they you would tell New Directions and… they threatened to kick me out if I said anything.

Rachel stared at him for a long moment. "But you would tell me, right?" His eyes were small and sad.

"Of course." His tone was small and soft, and if her eyes had been closed she could have sworn it was Finn who had said it. It was a tone he had used every time Rachel was unsure about something. But before Rachel could think about this she saw him lean forward slowly and press his lips onto hers.

Realization hit her like a ton of bricks. He was _kissing_ her.

Which was odd. Because Rachel believed in romance, and timing, and she believed in important cues to kiss a lady, and that didn't seem like one of them. Or maybe it was, and she happened to miss it because she was too busy thinking of how much he sounded like Finn… but it didn't matter because she was kissing Christian.

She wasn't sure how to feel about that.

She slowly opened her eyes as he pulled away, her lips were still parted and she remained silent. But her attention was drawn over his shoulder as she heard the tinkling of a bell and the roar of a truck. She ran over to the window, leaving behind a stunned Christian, and saw a red chevy backing out of Breadsticks, and back onto the highway.

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**A/N:** **Eek. Like I said. I'm gonna need to write a fluff shot after this is done, I keep going to sleep depressed. Hope the wait didn't ruin it!**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	14. The Girl Who Cried Spy

**A/N: Uggh guys, sorry for being so shitty. I got discouraged by my lack of love for this season of Glee.**

**Personally I'm going for the movie rule. The first ones awesome, then they make a sequel and it SUCKS ASS, but then they make a third one and it's good again. CROSS YOUR FINGERS!**

**Disclaimer: I know y'all think I own Glee, I don't. Sorry for misleading you to thinking I was awesome.**

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Showface Chapter Fourteen: The Girl Who Cried Spy

_The Next Day…_

"Why so glum, Lover Boy?" Santana commented snidely as Puck huffed in the room, an annoyed look on his face. "Did you're girl break up with you for being so clingy? Not surprised, it's annoying as hell." Kurt rolled his eyes from where he sat next to Finn. Santana had been a pissy mood ever since Alicia got top of the pyramid for Cheerios; snappy remarks were just one of the perks of talking to her nowadays.

"S'matter with you San? PMSing again?" Puck shot back half-heartedly, plopping down next to Quinn while she gave him a look of disgust. Finn turned around to face him.

"Any news 'bout Rachel?" The atmosphere had gone from casual to tense, and everyone who had tried to ignore the pessimism that was Santana and Puck were definitely paying attention now.

"Yep," He said indifferently, clapping his hands to his thighs. "She's not coming back. Like, ever. Not like we need her though." Finn looked confused and opened his mouth to act what Puck meant, but he cut him off. "She's got herself a boyfriend." Alicia who had been flipping through sheet music by the piano, disregarding the plotting perked up immediately, nearly dropping all the paper on the floor.

"Who?" She said, letting her mask drop for just one moment before correcting herself. "I-I mean, what's his name?"

"Christian." Her eyes went wide, and they could her teeth grinding together in frustration.

"You know what?" She said, crossing her arms over her chest. "I've… I gotta go… pick up my costume, I'll be back… maybe." She explained hurriedly, making her way out of the room. Quinn raised her eyebrows, but didn't say anything.

"Yeah," Puck continued, completely unfazed. "Apparently she's like really happy there or something," He struggled to sound lethargic as he kept his face unexpressive. "Oh well, I mean we got Leech right? See's who's laughing when we beat them at Regionals." No one in the room seemed particularly convinced by his act, but everyone just went back to what they were doing before until Mr. Schue walked in ten minutes late, as per usual.

* * *

Rachel gazed at her reflection in the shiny wood surface of the bar Christian had just wiped down, trying to get her hair to part slightly to the left like she liked it. She was the only one sitting at the bar, it being about nine o'clock at Breadsticks, so she got both excellent service and a very chatter bartender. She's knows lots of people say she talked more than she should, but she had a feeling this girl could go on for hours without any response for her. It wasn't until she finally interrupted her merely to say "Shirley Temple, please," did she finally pause to even acknowledge her. Rachel twirled the cherry stem in her lips, staring at the clock as the hurt bartender whipped out her cell phone.

Rachel absolutely hated waiting for Christian's late shifts to end, she did meet a many rare people here. Just last night she had a conversation with a man that was completely wasted, rambling on about the time he swam with whales for a documentary on Discovery Channel. She's not sure if he was telling the truth, but he did make very impressive imitation of the Humpback, Right, and Sperm whale. At the moment she and Christian had an ongoing bet on whether or not she'd meet a movie director one night, and have the bar at Breadsticks be her gateway to fame.

Rachel heard the bell at the front of the restaurant jingle and she turned to see if it was the last of the costumers heading out, but the woman dressed in bright orange overalls was still sitting alone at her booth, ice water pressed against her forehead. Rachel turned her head back to the bar, thinking it must have been one of the employees going home, but then she heard a voice coming from the other side of the room.

"Oh. My. God. What are you _doing_ here?" Rachel whipped her head around, recognizing the voice immediately. Alicia stood by the kitchen door, clicking her designer heels impatiently. Rachel's eyes narrowed in annoyance, as Alicia's eyebrows shot up expectantly, waiting for an answer.

Rachel rolled her eyes and turned back to the bar, taking a sip of her drink before answer, just for good measure. "I'm waiting for Christian to finish his shift," She twirled her straw in the soda, and placed her cherry stem next to it absentmindedly. "We're going to see a movie." Out of the corner of her eye she saw annoyance flash across Alicia's face, and then it was masked by a smirk. She put her hands on her hips, letting them sway as she strutted over to where Rachel was sitting. She stood as close as she could possibly get, until she was towering over Rachel, forcing her to look up.

"Yeah," She said coolly. "He likes to do that with his girlfriend's." Rachel was unimpressed.

"Why, did you use to date him?" She asked, in a mildly sarcastic tone, before taking another sip or her drink.

Alicia gritted her teeth together again. "Still am." Rachel felt the straw drop from her mouth as her head snapped in Alicia's direction, trying to read her and see if she was lying, but there wasn't a trace of insincerity in her expression, though there was just about everything else. Rachel felt her face drop, right alone with her stomach, and suddenly she didn't feel so smug anymore, in fact, she felt like she was going to be sick. She clutched herself, trying to keep it together, while Alicia continued to grin nastily before taking a sip of Rachel's drink, and walking away cockily.

She heard the kitchen door swing open as the front door jingled, and Christian enter just as Alicia walked out. He walked over and placed a kiss on her temple, who was still sitting shock still, clutching her stomach. "Sorry babe, had to take out the trash. Meet anyone awesome tonight?"

* * *

"Yo Satan?" Artie asked from next to Mercedes. "Where's Leech?"

Santana turned to face Artie in disgust. "Why would I know where she is? I hate that girl." A silence filled the room, broken only by the murmurs of Kurt and Quinn in the corner, discussing hairstyles. Then they heard the clicking of shoes coming down the hall, getting louder and louder. They all turned to face the door, expecting to see the loud Latina, but were greeted instead by and obviously unsettled Rachel Berry.

She walked right to the front of the room without any further explanation and launched right into a speech before anyone even had the time to react. "Okay, I know I am no longer a part of New Directions, as I don't live here anymore, and am not currently attending this school. And while I don't want any of you to be under the impression that I plan on returned or that my loyalty still lies with you, I have returned for a short period of time, but only so I can tell you about something that has been bothering me for quite a while now. It is _not _because I don't want my team to win; I simply do not want my team to win by _cheating_. Do you understand?" Mr. Schue was standing at full attention, and the entire room was staring at her with wide eyes.

"Is this a dream?" Brittany asked distantly. Rachel sighed, her shoulder slumping slightly before she drew them back up again.

"Alicia's a spy. She's really the female lead of Aural Intensity. She's only here to mess you guys up." Everyone was silent.

"Why should we believe you?" Puck asked loudly, staring her right in the eye. Rachel, who had been trying to avoid looking at him, darted her eyes back in forth. "You could be faking." Her eyes filled with irritation.

"Why _shouldn't_ you believe me?" She countered frostily.

"Because. You're not on this team anymore, you don't care about us. The only reason you probably telling us this is so we kick out the one member on this team that can help us beat you." He said angrily, leaning forward.

"He's right Rachel, that girl can sing." Mercedes agreed heatedly, before looking Rachel up and down. "Probably better than you can."

Hurt flashed across Rachel's face. No one had ever straight up said someone was better than at the one thing she felt she could do better than anyone. She bit her lip, trying not to be distracted. "But, I'm not lying." Her voice wavered and she hated it. This is what she got for trying to help them.

Mr. Schue stood up slowly from the piano, putting a hand on Rachel's shoulder. She was almost glad he didn't say something rude or kick her out angrily, he just said "I think you should go now," quietly in her ear. One hand on her back he lead her out to door like a misled child as Rachel fought hard not to turn around to see the expression on Puck's face. She wasn't sure she wanted to know anyway.

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**A/N: Sorry for the shortness, I sorta just forced myself to write this out of nowhere. Anyway, only three more chapters until this story is finished and I can move onto something a little more up-to-date! (Well technically three chapters and an epilogue, but.. ya know…)**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


	15. Curiosity Killed the Cat

**A/N: Okay, so this is my last chapter before I have to go away for Thanksgiving, but I'll be back Saturday and hopefully post another Chapter on Sunday! READ ON!**

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Chapter Fifteen: Curiosity Killed The Cat

_One week later…_

"I know Queen's a kind of overused band for Glee club, but I have this feeling that it's gonna do big things for us." Mr. Schue said excitedly to the group of teens. A few rolled their eyes; others seemed to perk up a little.

"Wasn't that Vocal Adrenaline's go to band?" Kurt asked lazily, his entire body faced toward Mercedes. Mr. Schue grimaced, but nodded. Across the room, Alicia looked up from her clipboard on which she was writing notes with a feathery pink pen and raised her hand.

"Which song?"

"Umm, well, before you arrived we were working on Don't Stop Me Now. I think it's a good song, overall just fun; something the audience will want to hear. Something they're gonna wanna get up and dance to." Finn sighed loudly in the front row, Mr. Schue ignored him. "You can take Rachel's part." Alicia's eyebrows rose delicately as she wrote something down on the paper before asking, "Can you show me the choreography plan?"

"Why so you can take a picture of it? Or so you can copy it down onto your little clip board?" Puck asked starkly from the back row. He didn't want to believe a word Rachel had said, but he had been thinking about it a lot lately, and the more he did, the more sense it made. Alicia however, dismissed his interruption completely, and continued to stare at Mr. Schuster expectantly. He mouthed one moment, flipping through his folder, and then turned to look at Puck. Puck wasn't particularly good at reading people, (or sometimes he was and just choose to ignore it), but the look Mr. Schue was giving him started off as, 'Puck, this needs to stop. Whatever Rachel said, there's nothing to be suspicious about.' But after he took a looked at Alicia, and then looked it what he was handing her, his face began to read, 'Well, shit.'

* * *

Rachel bit her lip, and gave Christian a small kiss on the cheek. He didn't respond at all, instead just turning the volume on the football game he was watching up. Rachel's face fell in disappointment as she sank back in her seat. "Christian, you hate football." He didn't say anything. She played with her hands for a minute before adding, "And me, apparently." The football game was suddenly on mute as Christian turned to her and smiled, before giving her a small, sweet kiss, then turning to the clock.

"What time does McKinley Glee club end?" Rachel's eye flashed with hurt.

"Why? Is your girlfriend going to be here soon?" Christian turned to her for a minute, not saying anything. "God, what am I supposed to be? Your mistress?"

"Rachel, no, and don't say that it sound weird." He said, shifting uncomfortably.

"Then what am I supposed to call it? You're cheating on your girlfriend with _me_! Why haven't you broken up with her?" She asked outrageously, scooting herself as far to the other side of the couch as she possibly could. She liked Christian, but he reminded her of Finn in the worst of ways. He was the kind of guy who would lie, yet she would always have to forgive. The kind of guy who was too spineless to break up with their bitchy girlfriend for the girl they actually cared about. The kind of guy that made her feel like she was always playing second fiddle to someone, like there was some big elephant in the room they always had to squeeze around. Couldn't she have someone who cared enough to put a fight?

Someone badass?

"Rachel, you know how I feel about you. But I can't just break up with Alicia!"

"Why not?" Rachel asked, her voice softer this time, sounding sadder. Christian opened his mouth and closed it, unable to give an answer. And then all at once, Rachel had had enough. Grabbing her keys and her coat she walked out of the house, ignoring the shouts Christian sent after her. Wasn't she ever going to find the right guy for herself? Wasn't she ever going to find someone who cared about her enough to choose her over somebody else?

So for the first time in her entire life, Rachel Berry pressed the speedometer until it went way over the speed limit, and didn't slow down for a single second until she was backing into her drive way. It just felt good to go fast, because then it felt like she was going somewhere with this, like she was getting further and further away from everything she wanted to get away from. It felt like she was finally leaving behind everything she had left at McKinley. It felt like she was moving forward.

She came home to an empty house. Her dad was always away, at his new job, which ended up needing even more hours than the last. She stood in the door way for a moment, closing her eyes in frustration, and before she knew it she was running all over the house, turning on ever single light until it practically glowed with warmth, and from the outside, it no doubt looked like a perfect family home. But it wasn't. It was just Rachel.

Her melancholy was interrupted by the buzz of her cell phone, which seemed to be interrupting most of her self-thought sessions nowadays. She could remember when she had to bribe to Glee club for their phone numbers, and make numerous Facebook accounts for friends. She reached out to her bedazzled pink phone, sitting on her dresser, baring a message from Christian that she didn't even bother opening. She just deleted it.

But as she sat on her bed she began to wonder what he even had to say to explain him. What half-wit excuse he could possibly pull. Drumming her nails across her phone a bit, she drew over ounce of self-control not to look at the text, and then opened her phone to read it. She went straight to her trash bin, holding only three messages. This most recent one from Christian, and then the two from Puck she'd received on her first day at Lincoln.

Suddenly she wasn't so interested in Christian's text anymore.

Hesitating, she closed her eyes and pressed the read button, opening them to see that message for the first time, not having bothered reading it the first time.

**Look. I know you don't want to talk to me right now. I get it. But I kind of miss you. We all do. It's only been like a couple days and it's already not the same without you. Face it, without you; it's like taking music away from Glee club. It's like telling them they can try as hard as they want but they're still always gonna be missing that stunning young ingénue everyone roots for. Like Finn said, the way you get on people is annoying, but it makes them care. Hell, it made me care enough to actually type this whole thing out without using text talk, and actually put the little accent over the e in ingénue. So okay, maybe it's just text, and I consider that caring a lot. Yeah, whatever, that says a lot of shit about me. And the fact that you're probably not even gonna read this, says a lotta shit about us. But I don't think you wanted to leave McKinley. You just wanted to leave yourself. And trust me, that's not gonna happen. I've tried. And the only reason I'm even saying any of this is so you know that once you figure that out, you can come back, because we're pretty fucked without you.**

**So, yeah. **

Rachel immediately let out a long breath she didn't know she was holding in. She felt like she had just run a marathon and then had the breath knocked out of her. She exited her trash box and clicked composed, typing Puck in the 'to' field. She held a breath she couldn't afford to, wondering what to say.

He probably didn't feel the same way anymore. Not after what happened with Christian. But she really just wanted someone to talk to, especially with all this Christian stuff. She needed a friend that … she just needed a friend. Amanda was nice but she was just… Rachel didn't even know who to explain it, or why Puck was better. He didn't trust her, and he probably wanted to find her lying in a ditch somewhere. She was his competition, and Puck was much more professional than that. She continued rambling on in her head until she had run through all the reasons why this was a _bad idea_. Then she finally took one glance in the mirror and said, 'Screw it.'

**R: I got your text.**

She regretted it the minute she pressed send. She wished she could just reach right into cyberspace and grab it back. He wasn't going to reply to her, he probably didn't even know what she was talking about. Suddenly her phone vibrated again, and her head nearly span with anticipation as she pressed open.

**P: Well you didn't text me back. **

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**A/N: I'm sorry. I had to, I kind of hate angst. Haters gonna hate.**

**-xoxo SIL xoxo**


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